Saiyuki Extreme Chapter 1
by GojyoLoverForever
Summary: When faced with a chance to regain the lives they lost in heaven, what will the Sanzo Ikkou choose? You know the drill I dont own Saiyuki Characters but the others are mine.  There are some scenes of mild violence, some language, and character death ahead
1. Chapter 1

It had been a grueling day for the Sanzo Party, the sun had been blazing down on them the entire day, they had run out of water- again- and of course their leader was in a less than friendly mood. All they had seen for miles and miles and miles was sand, rocks and the occasional field of wild flowers. Now and then a bird few overhead cawing at them as they drove by.

"Sanzo…" Goku said as he leaned over the side of the jeep.

"Shut up you stupid monkey!" Sanzo said as he whacked Goku with his fan. "I don't want to hear another word from you, do you understand?"

"But… Sanzo! I'm hungry… its been ages since I ate and..."

"Do you have a death wish? Shut up!"

Hakkai laughed softly, those two were at it again. He really couldn't blame little Goku, it was hot and it had been quite a while since they had last ate; even he was starting to get hungry. Hakkai stopped laughing and glanced to the back of the jeep. Goku was sitting down staring at the passing landscape. That was not what had caught his attention, it was Gojyo himself. Normally the kappa would have been right there in the middle of it all… in fact, he was usually the one getting Goku wound up. However, now was sitting there, his shakujo in his hands as he ran his thumb over the blade. His eyes held a far off look to them as he stared at nothing, the hot wind blowing his flaming red hair back.

"Kind of quite back there Gojyo" Hakkai said with a smile. "Finally learned to tune Goku out?"

"Huh? Oh sorry guys… guess I got lost in my thoughts there."

"An awfully short trip I'd say" Sanzo muttered as he took a drink from the canteen at his side.

"Why you son of a…" Gojyo explained as he jumped up.

"Sit… your ass… down" Sanzo growled as he drew the gun and aimed it at Gojyo.

"Now!" he snarled as he cocked the gun.

Silence fell over the jeep as they continued on their way.

"Well that was quiet interesting" Hakkai said in his simple honest manner.

"Shut up" Sanzo muttered. 

The rest of the ride was fairly silent other than the occasional sigh from Goku or Sanzo and a cheep now and then from Hakuryu. As the sun hit its highest point in the sky, they reach the town.

"I thought we would never get here!" Goku said as he jumped out of the back of the Jeep. "I'm starving; let's go find something to eat!"

Sanzo muttered something as he whacked the monkey again. Hakkai turned and glanced back to the jeep. Gojyo was still sitting there, staring out across the field beside the road.

"Gojyo? You coming?"

"Oh yeah… I'm coming" he said as he pulled his gaze away and followed after Sanzo.

"Are you feeling alright Gojyo?"

"I'm fine Hakkai. It's nothing…its just a field of red flowers. Come on."

Hakkai followed after, telling Hakuryu to stay there for them outside the hotel. He kept looking at Gojyo. Something was wrong, he knew it, but until he decided to open up about it there was nothing they could do.

Dinner was eventful as always and Hakkai ended up apologizing to the waitress for the mess Goku and Gojyo had made and for the bullet hole in the wall which Sanzo so 'discreetly' decided to put there. Gojyo sighed and stood from the table as they got ready to leave.

"Where do you think you're going?" Sanzo asked over his cup of hot tea. "You're not already on the lookout for babes are you?"

"Shut up you stupid monk. I'm just going outside to get some air."

The three friends stared as he stormed off.

"What's the matter with him?" Goku asked softly.

"Honestly… a lot" Sanzo said frankly.

"Now, now gentlemen, I'm sure there is a logical explanation for our friend's strange mood" Hakkai said as he followed them. He stopped in the door way a moment and looked back to where Gojyo had been sitting a few minutes earlier and he could no longer see any sign of him.

"Gojyo… what is it that is bothering you so deeply?" he muttered softly as he closed the door behind him. 

Gojyo had left the others without another word and went outside. Walking away from the town he found himself in the field of flowers again… those crimson red flowers.

"Red… like my hair and my eyes… red, like blood" he whispered softly to himself as he gazed out across the field of flowers that seemed to glow in the setting sun. Gojyo bent down and picked up one of the flowers and looked at it as his mind drifted back to a time long ago, back to his memory of red flowers.

"Look mamma! I got these red flowers for you. I saved up my money for a whole month to get them! Aren't they pretty?"

"They are red…. red like blood!"

Gojyo flinched as if he was being hit yet again.

"Mamma stop it! Please stop!"

"How could you, do I mean that little to you…. You little…"

She grabbed a handful of his blood red hair as he beat him. She seemed determined to pull it from his head as she continued to hit him, all the while, tears streaming down her face. "I hate you Gojyo! I hate you! It would have been better if you had never been born!"

"Mom stop it! Leave him alone."

Gojyo looked up to see his older brother Jein holding his mother back as she turned and clung to him sobbing.

"Jein.. I can't stand it, I can't stand to even look at him!"

"Gojyo go to your room. Now!" he yelled.

Gojyo sank to his knees as the vision faded. He looked across the field his eyes blurry with the tears that silently ran down his face. He looked at the flowers around him then his hair which hung around his face.

"Red… red like blood. It would have been better if I had never been born."

He hung his head as a sob caught in this throat and thunder rumbled nearby. Standing slowly, he made his way out of the field and down the streets deeper into town, not really knowing or caring where he was going- his mind was still lost back years ago. The sun sank lower in the sky as night began to fall and still Gojyo wandered down the streets as the rain began to fall, but Gojyo knew it was going to get worse before it got better. Soon he came across a small pub tucked away in one of the back alleys.

"Well it beats walking around like a half drowned rat" he mused to himself as he pushed open the door and walked in.

The pub was pretty well empty and only a few people were sitting scattered across the room. A thick haze filled the room and Gojyo could distinctly smell that familiar mix of smokes, alcohol, and perfume. Darts were stuck into one of the support beams with countless holes peppering the walls surrounding it, telling tales of long, drunken games. A worn out pool table stood in the corner, unused for some time, as evident by the thick layer of dust and the cobwebs that covered the corner pockets. A man sitting near the bar turned and looked at Gojyo as he walked in. His hair was like silver threads on his head that fell almost to his shoulders. As he turned Gojyo gasped slightly… his eyes, one was green, the other was golden, as golden as Goku's. The man nodded, a slight hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he turned his attention back to the mug of ale in front of him.

The barkeep seemed to have dozed off behind the bar, an empty bottle of spirits in his hand. Gojyo walked over and tapped the man. He didn't move. Gojyo looked at him a moment then smiled, reached over behind the bar, and grabbed one of the bottles. With a smug grin he walked over to one of the tables on the far side of the room, took out his deck of cards and began to shuffle the cards. A short time later the man from the bar stood and made his way over to Gojyo.

"Mind if I join you,?" he asked as he stood at the table and started to pull out a chair. "It's been a while since I have found a good competitor."

"Not at all" Gojyo said "as long as you got some cash on you."

"Oh and gambling man are we?" he asked with a laugh. "Well I believe you will find my game interesting, and my offers, acceptable." The man reached into his pocket and pulled out a wad of bills and set them on the table. "Am I in?"

"You got yourself a game!" Gojyo exclaimed, that gleam in his eyes.

The game progressed, the bids rising higher and higher until there was a good pile of money on the table between them.

"I would estimate that is about 5,000 yen sitting there" the man said.

"So you better kiss it all goodbye, cuz I'm about to clean house," Gojyo said with a laugh. "Let's see your hand."

The stranger laid down his cards and slowly pulled back his hand revealing two pairs, a King and a Queen. He smiled slightly.

"Oh very good hand" Gojyo said. "But I am afraid it is not enough to beat this!" He threw his cards face up on the table. "Royal Flush buddy!"

"Very good, you have skill I see. You must do this quite a lot on those long lonely nights when you try to escape your past and the memories that haunt your sleep. Is that how you deal with the pain and hurt of your past, gambling for money and bedding a different woman each night to fight off the loneliness?"

"Yeah I have some experience with it" Gojyo said coldly as he started stacking the bills together to count them. "What of it? Guy's gotta make a living you know."

The man eyes Gojyo. Those eyes.. one green and one golden. Gojyo knew of the golden eyed ones. Goku was one of them- heretics- yet he was different. His two tone eyes reminded him of someone… someone he had seen before. And that hair, silver strands of shining light. It was as if he had seen this man somewhere before, but he couldn't quite figure out where or how he knew the stranger.

"Yes Gojyo… we all have our ways. We all have our own ways of making it through this life… of dealing with the hurt and pain of our pasts."

"Look buddy" Gojyo said as he lit a cigarette "do you have a death wish or something?" He sighed, the guy was getting really annoying. He stood up, slipping the stack of bills into his pocket and turned to go.

"I know what you are" the man hissed as he grabbed Gojyo's wrist. "You are a half breed, a child forbidden to even be alive. Hair and eyes the color of blood, how much blood and tears has been spilt because of you?"

His fingers felt like ice, and fire on Gojyo's wrist, a burning iciness that seemed the flow through his very blood.

"Piss off" Gojyo said as he jerked his hand away and left the tavern. It was still raining but he didn't care, he couldn't stay with that creep another moment. Gojyo wandered around the streets for a good half hour until he found a familiar looking road and followed it back to the hotel. By the time he went inside, climbed the stairs, and found the room Sanzo had gotten for them, he was shivering violently. 

"Gojyo!" Hakkai exclaimed as he opened the door and walked in.

"Hey man where you been?" yelled Goku as he looked up from the table where he was cleaning off yet another plate of food.

Gojyo stood there, leaning against the door frame, dripping wet as a puddle formed at his feet as Hakkai walked over.

"Gojyo? You ok?"

Gojyo muttered something as his eyes closed and he fell forward. Hakkai ran up and caught him as he fell, lowering to the floor carefully as Goku ran over.

"Hakkai, what's wrong with him?"

"I don't know Goku… he's soaking wet and shivering yet his face is hot."

"It serves him right for running off in the rain like that. What an idiot" Sanzo muttered as he turned away.

"Sanzo!" Goku said as looked at the monk.

Sanzo ignored them and stood by the window watching the rain.  
Hakkai picked up Gojyo and carried him into the bedroom and laid him on the bed.

"What's up with Sanzo?" Goku asked as he stood beside Hakkai, looking at Gojyo with concerned eyes.

"I have no idea… but right now our main concern is Gojyo."

"If he going to be ok Hakkai?"

"I'm sure he will…"

Hakkai smiled at Goku who nodded then went back to finish his dinner. When he was gone Hakkai turned his attention back to Gojyo, this time concern written on his face.


	2. Chapter 2

All that night, and into the early morning, Gojyo remained asleep. Hakkai and Goku took shifts watching over him, though Goku eventually ended up falling asleep in the chair. As the sun rose over the buildings and shone into their room, Hakkai came in, carrying a small tray with some food on it. Goku immediately woke up and ran over to him. 

"What did ya bring me Hakkai?" 

"This isn't for you my friend… it's for Gojyo when he wakes up." 

"Awwww, come on just a bite! I'm starving. Gojyo aint even awake yet!" 

"Sanzo has the rest of it in the kitchen Goku, there's plenty for you." 

"Don't even think… about…eating my breakfast, you monkey" a voice said from the bed.

"Gojyo you're awake!" Goku exclaimed excitedly. "How do you feel?"

"Tired… and hungry… what, what happened?"

"You don't remember?" Hakkai asked as he sat down in the chair by the bed as Gojyo sat up slowly.

"I remember up to coming back to the hotel, and somehow finding the room… after that, no… I don't remember."

"Just rest easy. I think you just wore yourself out the last few days. I know you haven't been sleeping very well."

"The all knowing Hakkai" he said with a grin. "I'll be fine, honest."

"I know" Hakkai said simply.

"Come on Hakkai, I want to go get breakfast!" Goku said as he tugged on his shirt. "Come on!" 

"Alright Goku, I'm coming. We'll be back in a bit Gojyo, ok?" 

He nodded and watched them leave, then picked up the tray Hakkai had left for him. He wasn't really hungry but he knew he needed to eat. As Gojyo sat there in bed, staring out the window at the early morning sky outside, his thoughts went back to the night before and that stranger. That silver hair and those eyes- one emerald green the other golden- eyes that seemed to look right through him. 

"I know what you are" he heard the man's voice again in his head. "You are a half breed, a child forbidden to even be alive. Hair and eyes the color of blood, how much blood and tears has been spilt because of you?"

"Shut up!" Gojyo said as he shut his eyes tightly. 

"I hate you Gojyo… it would have been better if you had never been born!" 

"M….Mother?" he whispered softly.

"Gojyo… die…" 

"No!" he yelled in his mind as he covered his ears. "Stop it… just stop it…" he whispered weakly.

A few hours later the bedroom door opened and the three friends looked up from where they were sitting, talking around the table. There stood Gojyo, looking less than rested and rejuvenated. 

"How are you feeling?" Sanzo asked without really looking up at him. 

"Wow…the monk actually cares what happens to the water sprite, imagine that" Gojyo said as he walked in and took his seat in the only empty chair at the table.

"You're looking better" Hakkai ventured softly, eyeing Gojyo closely. 

"Yeah you do" chimed in Goku, his face full of lo-main "For a water sprite you looked half drowned last night." 

"Thanks" Gojyo said as he reached over and took the last cabbage roll of Goku's plate.

"What you go and do that for! That was mine, you crazy kappa!"

"It was yours, now it is mine. It is quite tasty as well."

"Why you… I 'otta… that was mine!"

"Oh be quiet you little monkey!" 

"Water Sprite!" 

"Well it is nice to see Gojyo is back to normal" Hakkai said with a laugh.

"Nice for you maybe" Sanzo muttered as he lit another of his Marlborough Reds. "I could do without all the noise." 

Hakkai just smiled as Hakuryu flew over and landed on his shoulder cheeping softly and nuzzled him playfully. 

That evening they were all gathered round the single bed.

"Sooo… who gets the bed tonight?" Goku asked.

"Well Gojyo had it last night but that was only because he was sick" Hakkai said as he pulled the cover over Hakuryu as he curled up in his basket. 

"Ne, doesn't matter to me either way" Gojyo said as he ran his hand through his hair. 

"In that case I'll take the bed" Sanzo said as he walked over. 

"No!" cried Goku as he jumped on Sanzo's shoulders. "I haven't slept in a bed in weeks!"

"With good reason you monkey! Get off me! Monkeys sleep on the floor, not in beds!"

"Big bully" Goku grumbled as he dropped down off Sanzo's back and onto the floor. He sat there pouting as the monk stepped over him. 

"Well glad that is all settled" Gojyo said sarcastically as he walked over to the last mat laid on the floor and laid down. He was still exhausted and seemed to fall almost immediately to sleep. 

Soon the only sound in the room was the soft breathing of Sanzo and Hakkai, the snoring of little Goku, and the restless sleep of Gojyo. As he slept, his sleep was plagued with voices from the past. Again he heard his mother's voice, as clear as if she was right there talking to him… 

"I hate you Gojyo. I could never love the child that reminds me of the man I once loved and the woman he had adultery with! I look at you, and I see him… I see her! I hate you Gojyo… I hate you!" 

Even in that deep pit of nightmarish sleep Gojyo could feel the pain of those words and could remember all too clearly what that did to him as a young boy. His mother always seemed to be crying when she looked at him… and he wished there was a way to make her stop. He knew she hated him and wanted him dead… Gojyo knew that… he always knew it. 

"I hate you Sha Gojyo. How could I ever love a half-breed like you?" 

"I'm sorry mother" Gojyo whispered in his sleep as he tossed and turned, fighting to wake himself up for the all too real dream. He couldn't see anything but he could hear every word and ever sob that came from her throat. 

"Mom, its ok…" the new voice was that is Jein, his brother. 

How often had he been the one to come between them? It was Jein who would comfort their mother, and shield Gojyo from her fits of rage. They were only half brothers, yet that made no difference in Jein's eyes, and he watched out for Gojyo and protected him the best he could- just like the big brother that he was. 

The voices faded away and all that was heard was sobbing... the sobs he heard so often as a child, the sobs of his mother. They grew louder and louder and echoed in his ears, the sobs and cries of anger, pain, and betrayal. Gojyo fought to wake himself up, the cries growing louder and louder. Finally he forced himself awake, sitting up with a yell, chest heaving, and sweat rolling down his face. 

"Gojyo? What's wrong… are you alright?" Hakkai asked as he sat up and looked across the still sleeping form of Goku.

"N… nothing" he gasped trying to slow his racing heart. "Just… just a bad dream…"

"In that case… let the rest of us go back to sleep" muttered the half awake Sanzo from his spot above them on the bed. 

Hakkai laid down, still looking over at Gojyo.

"Go to sleep Hakkai… I'm not going to be going back to sleep for some time. I need some air" he said as he stood up and walked out into the hall. 

"Hakuryu!" Hakkai whispered after Gojyo left. The small white dragon woke up and flew over to him, cheeping happily. "Hakuryu, I want you to go with Gojyo, keep an eye on him… I'm worried about him." The tiny dragon nuzzled him affectionately then few out the open window and down into the streets where Gojyo was walking. 

He didn't even notice the white dragon watching him from his perch on a street sign. Gojyo had his own distractions, mainly the voices in his head. Unlike a normal nightmare that is over shortly after one wakes up, the voices were still there- fainter than when he was asleep but he could still hear them none the less. He could still hear his mother sobbing, the pain and hate in her voice… and he could hear the voice of his brother, it was as if he was still asleep, the voices were still there. 

"Stop it…" he muttered, shaking his head. "Stop it! Stop it!" he yelled as he put his hands on his head trying to block out the voices. They stopped for a moment but soon they continued. Sighing heavily, Gojyo leaned against the side of the stable that was behind the hotel as the voices continued. 

"Sha Gojyo I hate you! I could never love you… I wish you were dead!" 

"Mom, leave him alone." 

"How could I ever love a half-breed like you? I hate you Gojyo!" 

"Gojyo, go to your room… now!"

"Red… hair and eyes the color of blood.. the blood of your father, the blood of that filthy woman!"

"Gojyo!" 

"Die Gojyo, die and then I can finally be happy once more…" 

"Stop it!" Gojyo screamed as he dropped to his knees, hands over his ears as he knelt in the mud, desperate to block out the voices. He cried out again and again, trying to overpower the voices and finally fell onto his side, in the mud, and laid there sobbing, hands held over his ears. "Stop it… stop it… stop it…"

Hakuryu cheeped softly as he watched. When Gojyo fell over and was still, he gave out a little cry and few back to the room and nipped at Hakkai's ear until he woke up.

"What is it Hakuryu? Where's Gojyo?" Hakuryu pulled at his shirt and Hakkai jumped up and ran down the stairs and outside following the dragon to where Gojyo was, still laying in the mud, muttering softly, hands still over his ears. 

"Gojyo…" Hakkai muttered as he dropped to his knees beside his friend.


	3. Chapter 3

"What the hell happened to him?" Sanzo exclaimed as Hakkai came back into the room, carrying a groaning Gojyo in his arms.

"I don't know.. I found him out side…" Hakkai gasped as he laid Gojyo on the bed as Sanzo moved aside. 

"Wake up you stupid monkey" Sanzo groaned as she kicked the sleeping Goku awake. 

Gojyo laid there, hands still pressed to his ears, groaning and writhing as if he was in pain. 

"Stop it…. make it stop… stop… stop it!" he groaned.

"What the devil is he talking about?" Sanzo asked.

Hakkai just shook his head as he held his hands out over Gojyo, that white glow forming as he channeled his Chi. A few minutes later he lowered his hands. 

"What's wrong with Gojyo?" Goku asked as he was just now fully waking up. 

"It seems he… he is hearing voices" Hakkai said simply as he looked up at them.

"Voices? You got to be kidding me…"

"I wish I was Sanzo… I do not know what the sources of the voices are, but obviously they are of a great pain for Gojyo." 

"But Hakkai… can't you just make the voices, you know, go away?" asked Goku. "You know, use your Chi?"

"I'm afraid Chi is not enough to help him at this point."

The three friends turned and looked at Gojyo as he laid there, muttering and groaning as if fighting with some horrid nightmare he was unable to awaken from. 

The next two days passed in much the same way… Gojyo's fits came and went, and with each wave of voices came a new level of madness for the kappa. The three friends took shifts watching over him as he slept the few hours that the voices let him, talked with him to try and distract him, and sat and watched helplessly as the madness took hold of him each time. On one particular night, Sanzo, who was himself deeply worried about Gojyo, sat by the bed watching as his companion slept fitfully for the first time in over a full day and night. 

"You're worried about him aren't you?" Hakkai asked softly as he came in. 

"Don't be ridiculous" Sanzo said as he turned away from the bed and lit a cigarette. "I'm just wanting the dumb ass to get better so we can get moving again. You know how much I hate being stuck in one place for long."

"Ah yes…" Hakkai said. He knew Sanzo was worried; he just was never very good at showing it. It was like that old saying Sanzo was so fond of "If you meet the Buddha, kill the Buddha. If you meet your father kill your father. Only live your life as it is, not bound to anything." It was his way of saying hold onto nothing so tightly that you would die to lose it- even your friends. And yet, Hakkai knew Sanzo did care deeply for them all, even Gojyo. 

"I could use some sleep.. you watch Gojyo for a few hours? Wake me when you need to. Sanzo?"

"Yeah go ahead Hakkai… I'll watch him."

Hakkai left the room. The sound of Goku snoring in the next room could be heard. Sanzo stood from the chair and stood by the window, gazing out across the moonlight field. Behind him, Gojyo moaned with the nightmares of the voices then fell silent once more. Sanzo turned, walked over to the bed and sat down on the edge and looked at Gojyo.

"You can stop that moaning any time now." He said as he turned and looked back out the window. 

"Go… to hell.. you damn monk…" Gojyo moaned as his eyes opened and he looked at Sanzo weakly.

"Seriously you're giving me a head ache."

"Heh, sorry to be an inconvenience…"

Sanzo turned back and look at his friend.

"You going to be alright Gojyo?" 

"Yeah…' he said in a shaky voice as he grabbed Sanzo's hand weakly and pulled it out from under his robe. In his hand was the silver, five chamber pistol he always carried. He smiled a sad smile as he pulled Sanzo's hand up and placed the gun at his forehead. "I'll be just fine… as soon as I'm free of these damn voices." 

Sanzo and Gojyo held each others gaze for a long while, staring at each other. Sanzo cocked the gun and Gojyo smiled slightly. Then Sanzo pulled his arm away and put the gun back inside his robes. 

"I'm not in the habit of killing my companions- half demon or not."

Gojyo tried to say something but slipped back into the tortured blackness that was always waiting for him. 

"Fight it Gojyo" Sanzo muttered as he sat on the edge of the bed, for the first time not trying to hide his emotions or feelings. "Do you hear me damn it? You are not giving up so easily Sha Gojyo!"

When morning finally came and Hakkai and Goku came in to check on Gojyo, they opened the door to find a surprising sight waiting for them- Gojyo lay in the bed asleep, and Sanzo was sitting in the chair by the bed asleep as he leaned over, his arms and head resting on the edge of the bed. Hakkai pulled Goku back into the hall and closed the door then knocked, giving Sanzo the chance to wake up before they went in. 

Sanzo lifted his head and looked at Gojyo who was still asleep. He sat up slowly, reached into his robe and pulled out his pack of cigarettes. Slowly the door creaked open and Hakkai poked his head into the room.

"Ah Sanzo, you're awake" he said as he walked in followed by Goku. 

"Yeah he's awake now but he wasn't bef…." 

Hakkai put his hand over Goku's mouth and laughed slightly.

"… and how is Gojyo?" he asked trying to get Goku to be quiet.

"Asleep" Sanzo said simply as he lit the cigarette.

"I'm worried about him Sanzo… he doesn't seem to be getting any better."

"Hakkai, Gojyo isn't going to… he, he's gonna make it right?" Goku asked as he stood beside the bed and looked down at his friend. 

"I don't know Goku… I honestly don't know…' Hakkai said as he put his hand on Goku's head gently. 

Gojyo was someplace far away from Shangri-La. Someplace far away from his friends and for the moment, away from the voices of his past that haunted him. He knew he was still asleep, still dreaming, in a way. The place seemed vaguely familiar to him, like he had been there before or had seen the place at some point in the past. Gojyo walked through fields of wildflowers, a soft gentle breeze blowing through his hair, and the sun shone in a clear blue sky. Near by stood dozens of beautiful cherry trees in full bloom, their tiny pink petals falling like snow in the wind. Japanese gardens, beautiful buildings of stone and precious stone, and water fountains stretched before him. What was this place, and why was he here?

"Beautiful isn't it Kenren Taisho? It is still as beautiful now as when you left, over 500 years ago is it not?"

Gojyo turned to see who was talking and took a step back as he gasped in surprise. The man standing before him had silvery hair that shone in the sun and his eyes… one was green the other was gold,"

"You…" he whispered. "Who… who are you?"

"Now, now Kenren… it is not polite to stare at people. My name is Yuuru, I serve the gods in the heavenly palace. You seem surprised to see me." 

"You could say that…and who the hell is Kenren. I don't know anyone by that name." 

"Oh but of course you do… YOU are Kenren."

Gojyo stared at the man then laughed.

"I get it. This is a dream, I'm going crazy because of the voices and now I'm really starting to lose it." Gojyo turned as if to walk away then stopped.

"They are gone aren't they? The voices are gone" the stranger said in a soothing voice that forced Gojyo to turn around.

"They… they are gone. They are really gone!" 

"Yes Kenren Taisho. The tortured past is no more. This is what I have to offer you, this new life… here."

"And where exactly is here?" 

"Tenkai" the stranger said with a grin.

"Tenkai? You… you mean this… is heaven?"

"That is it my friend. Do you really not remember any of your past life? You were not always Sha Gojyo, the half breed demon child. Your life was not always one of pain and suffering and loss. You were once Kenren Taisho, a god here in heaven, a general in the heavenly army, honored and revered by many and respected. You had authority, people listened to you, and you had power to change things that you did not like. This was your home, these were your friends and family, this was your life. Do you not remember, Kenren Taisho?" 

Gojyo stood there staring around him, as slowly his eyes widened. It was like a cover had been peeled away from his memories. Things from the past, memories he had forgotten, and ones he thought he never knew, were now as strong and real as any other. He remembered being Kenren Taisho, his life in Tenkai, and the life he use to have. His mind swam with all those forgotten memories and for a moment felt like he was suffocating under them. Dropping to he knees he gasped slightly. Then he started to laugh and looked up at the stranger. 

"I… I remember now" he said with a laugh as he ran his hands through his hair, still trying to come to grips with what it really meant. "I remember… I remember it all. Yet, there is something missing. There are these faces, these faces that I remember but I do not see here. Tenpo… Konzen… Goku…" 

"Ah yes… your friends. It is true your old companions here in the heavens are no longer with us. However, I do have good news. They will be arriving in time and will join you here Kenren. That is, if you will stay." 

Gojyo looked at Yurru questioningly.

"I told you when I met you that you would find my offer acceptable. Here it is: I offer you your old life back. A chance to live again here in the wonders of Tenkai, where you are loved, appreciated, and respected. Here there are no worries about half blood and demons. Here there is no Sanzo to order you around, no annoying monkey to get on your nerves, and no Hakkai to lecture you about your temper. "

Yurru walked over and put his arm around Gojyo's shoulder and turned him around to face the vast field of wildflowers. Every color and shade was there, except for one. Not a single red flower could be see, far as his eyes looks, there was not one red flower, and Gojyo smiled slightly. 

"Here there is no memory of the past- the voices will be forever gone, your step mother who tried to kill you will no longer be that haunting memory. You yourself will change, and for the better Kenren. No longer will your hair be the sign of a forbidden child, your eyes will no longer strike fear into the hearts of those who look upon you- rather, they will inspire admiration and respect from even the highest ranks of heaven. I offer you the chance to leave that life on earth and reclaim the life you once had. Wipe the blood from your hands, erase the memories from your mind, and remove the pain from her heart- embrace this new life, and find the peace you have search so hard and long to find. " 

Gojyo stood there staring, dumbstruck, trying to fully grasp the words he was hearing. Meanwhile, things were not going very well back on earth, back in the land of reality. 

"Gojyo! Gojyo don't you dare give up on us like that!" Goku shouted at the still form laying on the bed. "Do you hear me you crazy kappa? Wake up!" 

"Goku, cut it out" Sanzo said as he put his arm around the boy's quivering form and pulled him back away from the bed. "Hakkai will take care of him…" his eyes drifted from the closed eyes of Gojyo to Hakkai's as he held his hands over Gojyo's chest, the white glow of his Chi growing brighter. 

"Hakkai...' Sanzo whispered breaking the silence.

Slowly Hakkai lowered his hands, sweat forming on his forehead. Slowly he looked up at the concerned faces of his friends as the waited for him to say something… anything.


	4. Chapter 4

"Hakkai…hey Hakkai?" 

Sanzo finally let go of Goku as he walked over and stood by Hakkai's arm and stared down at the seemingly sleeping Gojyo. 

"Gojyo's fighting an intense battle. I don't know with what or whom he is struggling… I do know that, in all likely-hood, his life is on the line."

"Fighting?" Sanzo asked as he sat in the chair and pulled a cigarette out of the pack and lit it. Hakkai could tell he was worried, despite how much he tried to hide it. 

"Sanzo…" Hakkai thought to himself as he looked at the monk. "I know how much you worry about Gojyo, despite the front you try to put up. Even now I can see through it. You're chain smoking like a chimney and won't look us in the eyes. I know you are worried…we all are," he thought grimly. 

"It would appear that somehow Gojyo has been given a choice. There is this aura about him, I could sense it just now… it's not evil, and yet, yet it don't seem quite right to me either. Whatever it is, I am afraid the only person who holds Gojyo's life now is Gojyo himself. His decision, to whatever has been placed before him, will determine the outcome…of whether he lives or dies."

Goku and Sanzo stared at him like he was crazy.

"So, we just do nothing? We sit back and wait for him to die!?" Goku shouted as he jumped to his feet.

"What else can we do Goku?" Hakkai asked as he turned on the boy. "There is nothing we can do! Gojyo's spirit is not even here anymore, it is barely connected to his physical body at all. I don't like it any more than you do!" he snapped harshly. 

"Hakkai…" Goku muttered as he took a step back away.

"Calm down Hakkai," Sanzo said as he flicked the cigarette out the window.

"Don't tell me what to do! I'm sick of your crap and you acting like you have everything under control."

"Can I speak without you interrupting Hakkia?" Sanzo asked as he looked over at the young man sitting on the edge of the bed. 

Hakkai didn't answer so Sanzo took a breath as he spoke again. "If you meet the Buddha, kill the Buddha. If you meet your father kill your father. Only live your life as it is, not bound to anything."

"That us exactly what I'm talking about!" Hakkai exclaimed as he jumped up from his spot on the bed and lunged for Sanzo. 

Sanzo stood and grabbed Hakkai's hand in mid swing and held it firmly as his eyes locked with those burning green eyes.

"I'm sick of your talk Sanzo! You act like nothing is important to you! It's like you don't even care that Gojyo is dying! But I know different… I know you do care! Somewhere, deep inside… I know you do care so cut this crap out and stop being such a jerk!" 

Hakkai was trembling now as Sanzo still held his wrist firmly. Their eyes never left as they bore into each other. 

"What me? Care about the damn water sprite? Not likely," Sanzo said. 

Hakkai let out a cry and he tried to lunge for Sanzo again but the monk just pushed him back, still holding his wrists.

"Don't play with me Sanzo… I know better… I know you care. I know you care. Don't you?" Hakkai whispered as his eyes closed as he slumped forward, limp. Sanzo caught him easily.

"Damn idiot" he muttered as he pulled Hakkai's arm over his shoulder and lifted him off the floor. "Goku, stay with Gojyo."

Goku nodded and sat quietly in the chair by the bed as Sanzo left, carrying Hakkai out of the room and down the hall to the other bedroom. A few minutes later he returned and Goku turned towards him. 

"Sanzo I…." Goku stopped as he looked at Sanzo. He stared as the words faded from his mouth. Sanzo, the one who was always so tough and harsh with them all…there was something in his eyes. Could it be…tears?

"Sanzo?" Goku asked softly as the monk walked in and leaned against the wall by the window. 

"What?" he said as he leaned his head back against the plaster wall. 

"N…nothing."

Sanzo sank to the floor slowly, sitting there under the window, head back and his eyes closed. Goku wasn't sure but he swore he could see his lips quivering, as if he was fighting hard to hold back the emotions that wanted to be set free. With a sight Goku turned back and faced the bed, looking down at the unmoving Gojyo.

"Gojyo…." He whispered softly, tears running down his face. "Gojyo…" 

"So what will it be Kenren? I have made my offer. You are free to accept or reject my offer; I hold nothing to you or against you. The choice is yours and yours alone." 

Gojyo stood there a moment, looking across the vast fields, remembering every time before he had stood there want watched the birds fly overhead, marveled a the beauty, and relished the smell of cherry blossoms on the wind. Turning slightly he faced the man.

"Will I have any memory of them?"

"If by them you are referring to the Sanzo party then no. Your life with them will end and cease to exist. You will be Kenren again, with Kenren's memories, Kenren's past and with Kenren's friends. The life where you were truly happy, appreciated, respected… the life where you were truly loved."

Gojyo nodded a moment and turned back and stared across the gardens and water fountains to the distant mountains he had looked at so many times before. Snap shots of his past life flashed once more through his mind and he blinked hard to clear his mind.

"Alright… I accept your offer," he said simply as the wind blew across the field they were standing in, blowing his hair back in a light dance. "I will take back my life as Kenren Taisho and forget my life as Sha Gojyo." 

Yurru smiled slightly. "So be it…" slowly he walked up behind Gojyo, put his arm around him, and put his hand over his face gently. He put his hand over his eyes as he muttered something softly to himself. As he did, Gojyo felt himself start to drift away. His mind grew dark, his vision blurred as his eyes closed and he felt himself sink slowly onto the soft carpet of grass and wildflowers. 

"Go back to them… say your goodbyes" Yurru said to the sleeping Gojyo as he laid him on the ground. " Finish what you have started, and when you awake here with me again, you will never have to leave again, Kenren."

The blackness overtook Gojyo as he slept. For a while there was nothing but silence and stillness as he tried to remember what had just taken place. Try as he could, all he could remember was the struggle to get back to them… Them? Who's them? Ah yes, Hakkai, Goku, and Sanzo. That was who he was fighting to get back. 

In the silence he heard a noise… it sounded like breathing, ragged labored breathing. Who's breathing was it? The realization dawned on Gojyo, as the pain of consciousness started to fill his body, that the breathing was his own. Every breath was painful and he struggled to wake up.

Slowly his eyes opened, and as the haze cleared from before his eyes he looked around, searching for those faces he wanted to see. 

As his eyes cleared Gojyo turned his head painfully and scanned the room, searching for his friends. He didn't have to look too far. Hakkai was sitting in the chair by the bed, his arms and head resting on the edge of the bed as he dozed. Goku laid in the middle of the floor, curled up on his side, arm under his head for a pillow. Sanzo… where was Sanzo. Finally Gojyo saw him, sitting against the far wall, arms resting on his knees, head hanging down on his chest as he slept. 

Gojyo closed his eyes, fighting back to pain that was becoming more and more unbearable with every breath and movement. Turning back to Hakkai he weakly pulled his arm out from under the covers and reached out to him. 

"H…Hakkai… Hakkai…" he groaned, wondering if it was even loud enough for him to hear.

He needn't have worried, Hakkai's eyes snapped open and he sat up as he looked down at his friend. They stared at each other for a while in disbelief. 

"Gojyo…" Hakkai whispered softly as tears formed in his eyes. "Sanzo, Goku, wake up!"

Gojyo swallowed hard, trying to fight back the pain that filled him as two more familiar faces stood around the bed.

"Hakkai…" Gojyo gasped as he gripped his hand weakly. "I… I'm not going to last much longer. My strength, it's just a thin thread, and its… its about to break…"

"Gojyo, don't talk like that. You've made it this far, you'll be ok…" Hakkai said fighting back the tears that threatened to fall. 

"You cant give up now you crazy Kappa!" Goku said as he stood by the foot of the bed. 

Sanzo stood silent on the other side of the bed. He knew Gojyo spoke the truth, it was a miracle he had lived this long in his condition and without anything to eat or drink in over three days. 

"Hakkai…" Gojyo said as his eyes slid closed for a moment. "Keep… keep an eye on them will you?" Slowly he opened his eyes again and forced a weak smile. "The gods know they need it… almost as much as I did…" Gojyo laughed softly then coughed painfully the pain stealing all breath and words from him. 

"Shhh just rest Gojyo... don't try to talk. You're going to be fine, you're going to fine, you'll see…" Hakkai couldn't stand seeing his friend like that, but what hurt even more deeply was the fact that he knew deep down inside Gojyo was right… Hakkai, pulled his hand out from Gojyo's weak grasp as he closed his eyes and held his hands over Gojyo's chest. 

Sanzo and Goku stood by silently and watched. They all knew how useless it was- no amount of Chi would help him now, yet they knew they could not stop Hakkai either. A hand reached out and gripped Hakkai's wrist firmly, breaking his concentration as the light of the Chi faded away.

"Don't... waste it on me.. Hakkai," Gojyo said as he gripped his friends wrist and pulled his hand away. "It's too late for me…" 

"No… Gojyo!" 

"Be strong Hakkai. You know I can't stand… to see my friends cry." 

Gojyo forced a weak smile as another coughing fit took hold of him. He looked from Hakkai to Goku, then to Sanzo. 

"Be.. strong Hakkai. Goku… Sanzo…" his voice trailed off as his eyes slid shut, his breathing ragged and strained. He gripped Hakkai's hand as the last ragged breath left him. 

"Gojyo? Gojyo! No Gojyo!" Goku dropped to his knees at the foot of the bed, as big tears welled up in his eyes and fell, dripping to the ground. He leaned over, laying his head on the bed his hands on Gojyo's sheet covered leg as he cried.

"No… Gojyo…" Hakkai whispered as the tears finally fell, running down his face and neck. He sat there in the chair; head down on the bed, against his friend's shoulder as sobs shook his body. 

Sanzo stood there, where he had been this whole time, unmoving. He stared at the silent form laying on the bed, as the memories of that crazy kappa replayed in his mind. His fists were clenched at his sides as he fought to control his breathing, that feeling threatening to take over him. Slowly his hand stretched out to that red hair as he slumped against the bedpost, tears silently running down his face.

The three friends knelt there by the bed, as the full impact of their loss hit them. They knelt there as the memories of the past 5 years washed over them in painful, suffocating waves. They knelt there, shedding their tears as the hours passed, none willing or able to move from where they were.

Gojyo was gone… he wasn't coming back… he was gone.


	5. Chapter 5

Gojyo closed his eyes as he fell back into that darkness that reached around him, pulling him in deeper. Everything faded away, all sight, sound, and feeling vanished; all he knew was the darkness that surrounded him. There was no fear or worry, jut the calm assurance that there was something better waiting for him. Slowly he became aware of the slight tingling that was moving through his body, a soft warm feeling that filled him and drove every shred of fear or pain far from his mind. Faintly he heard someone calling and he forced his eyes open. A thick haze hung in the air, casting rays of pale light through its mist as Gojyo slowly opened his eyes, staring up into the light that shone down on him. 

Sunlight fell, causing him to squint as his eyes adjusted. He was laying on something soft, and he could smell the familiar scent of cherry blossom and jasmine on the air. A familiar voice was calling his name as a warm gentle breeze blew trough the trees overhead. Looking up into the rich brown branches, covered with pink cherry blossoms, Gojyo smiled as the soft delicate petals floated down like snow. 

"Welcome back Kenren, you have been greatly missed." 

Yuuru held out his hand to him with a smile. Gojyo looked up at him a moment, then smiled, reached up, and grasped his hand as he stood. 

"Good to be back Yuuru… good to be back…"

"What's wrong Kenren, you look distracted."

"It's just… something feels weird. What happened to me Yurru? How long have I been gone, and just where was I?"

"Ah that is a long tale to tell my friend. You will learn all the details in time. For now, let us go and rejoice with the others and share with them the wonderful news of your return to the heavens."

Kenren smiled and nodded as he followed his friend. No trace of his memory as Sha Gojyo remained and nothing remained at that moment to remind him of it. The memories were gone, just as Yuuru had said they would be; Gojyo's memories were replaced by those of Kenren, even his physical appearance bore no resemblance to his old self. Kenren had short black hair, a little longer and spiky on top, with a few wisps hanging down into his eyes. Gone was the red hair and eyes of the half demon. Kenren had ebony black eyes, clear and sharp, just like his personality. As he walked through the fields of wildflowers, the wind blowing gently, Kenren looked down at his clothes. Yes, these were the same clothes he usually wore- the black trousers and silver belt. The black leather jacket, complete with shoulder guards, hung down to his knees and was opened, revealing his shirtless torso, as was his common method of dressing- much to the annoyance of Kanzeon Bosatsu. Black boots made imprints in the soft tender grass as he walked, his long pistol bumping slightly at his side in that familiar pattern of his steps.

"Kanzeon Bosatsu will be thrilled to learn of your return Kenren" Yuuru said as they reached the main pagoda and climbed the familiar stairs.

"Oh I'm sure she will be…" Kenren said sarcastically as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a cigarette and lit it. "The Merciful Goddess does seem to have a certain tolerance for me though" he added with a laugh. 

"Ah we all have our quirks Kenren… you just chose to display yours a bit more often than the rest of us do."

"True that my friend" Kenren laughed as he finished the cigarette and flicked it away. "Well shall we then?" he asked as they pushed open the doors and walked into the meeting hall. 

"After you Kenren." 

They walked down the hall of marble, jade, and stone, and Kenren stopped before the long golden table where several people were seated talking among themselves. A slight grin played at the corners of his mouth as he caught bits of what they were saying as he walked up and knelt down before the figure seated at the middle chair. 

"It's him…. He returned."

"It can't be Kenren…. he's been gone for over…"

"It is him! No one else could ever pass for Kenren…. it is him!" 

"Merciful Goddess," Kenren said as he knelt down on one knee before them.

"Well, well… if isn't the mighty Kenren, returned after all these years. You must have had wonderful guidance and direction to find your way back to us" she said as he looked at Yuuru with a particular look in her eyes. 

"I do not fully remember or understand the reason for my leaving or how exactly I came to find my way back. However, I am back… and am glad to be back. "

Kenren looked around at the faces gathered in the room. Some were smiling; a few stared in disbelief, while others still whispered among themselves. Yes, it was good to be back; he had been missing the thrill of talking to these people… especially them…. Kenren turned back to Bosatsu as a thought occurred to him. 

"Merciful Goddess… I wanted to ask, where are Konzen, Tenpou, and Goku? I haven't seen them anywhere." 

"Ah yes, your companions. Naturally, you would be concerned about them. Kenren, I'm sorry to tell you this but they are not here. They too 'disappeared' shortly after you, and they too have not been back since then." 

"G…gone?" Kenren stared ahead blankly; it felt like he had been punched in the stomach.

"Come now Kenren" Bosatsu said as she stood, descended the stairs and stood before Kenren. "You found your way back to us, I am sure they will be able to in time as well." 

Gently she smiled and slipped her finger under his chin as he stood to his feet. "So don't be sad, you are home again."

Bosatsu then surprised everyone there by what she did next. With a soft smile she took a step towards Kenren, put her arms around his neck lightly in a hug. 

"We've been missing you…" she whispered in his ear. "It has been so boring here without you" 

Kenren stood there a moment in surprise then nodded and followed Yurru out of the Hall. As he left Bosatsu turned to her aid and sighed.

"Heaven just got a lot more interesting again."

He followed Yuuru through the familiar hall ways and rooms, meeting long time friends, and few who he considered less than friends. At last, he was standing before the large rose wood door, carved with Kenren's symbol- a giant cherry tree in full bloom. He stood there, a smile on his lips as his fingers traced over the deeply carved branches and blossoms.

"It's good to be back" he whispered softly as he reached out, grasped the golden handle and pushed the door open. 

Stepping into his room he found everything just as he had left it… a mess. Kenren walked over to the window and pulled back the white velvet curtains, letting the bright mid-day sun flood into the room. Despite his absence they room had been fairly well tended too. His stacks of books, papers, military maps, and notes were still where he had left them but there was no sign of an extended absence… it was as if he was just returning from a scouting trip or some other normal military surveillance trip. Absent-mindedly Kenren walked around the room which was full of military related paraphernalia including stacks of maps, scrolls, compasses, spyglasses, and piles and piles of books and records. His large desk was in the corner under the window, his large map spread across it, the corners weighted down with a book, the table lamp, his compass, and the last bottle of rice wine he had finished.

Looking up above the desk to the small shelf mounted on the wall, his eyes scanned the medals and honors he had received over the many years he had served as Head General of Heaven's Army. He had gained respect, admiration, and fear as a result, winning himself both friends and enemies, even in heaven. Some feared him and his unpredictable moods, his lack of respect for those in authority, and his rash speech and mannerisms, but that made it all the more interesting and appealing to Kenren. He had truly missed it in the time he had been gone to…wherever it was that he had been. 

Standing by the window and looking out, he heard a familiar song drifting on the breeze… one he had listened to for countless days before. Now, finally being back, the song was like a welcome home call to a wayward child. Kenren closed his eyes as he listened to the sweet song:

kodoku na yoru demo   
mayoi osoreru toki mo  
ima wa hitori demo   
kono ashi de doko made mo  
aruite ikeru hazu dakara

kono sekai de ikinuite-iku  
tame no tsuyosa wo  
anata ni negatte-iru kara  
kokoro no tobira wo hiraitara  
nanika ga miete kuru

ai no subete ni deaeru yo...

"I am home," he said softly as he smiled, walked back to the bed and fall onto his back, arms under his head as he drifted to sleep, listening to the song, smelling the cherry and jasmine blossoms, and wishing that Konzen, Tenpou, and Goku would hurry and find their way back home as well.

Back in the Great Hall, a meeting was being held between the Merciful Goddess, Yuuru, and the counsel. The topic of their meeting- the return of Kenren Taisho.

"Very well Yuuru, we have heard your thoughts on the matter," The Merciful Goddess said as she turned back to face the man kneeling before her. "You may go now."

Yurru stood and bowed before the assembly then turned without a word and left the Great Hall. As he closed the door behind him, he stood there, back to the door, as a grin spread across his face and he laughed softly.

"Merciful Goddess you cannot seriously be letting him go that easy!"

"And what would you have me do?" Bosatsu asked her aid as she sighed and looked at him. "What harm has it done having Kenren back with us?"

"What harm has it done? None… yet, and that is exactly my point! Do you not remember the very reason they 'disappeared' in the first part? Kenren for one has a hot temper, is uncontrollable, has no respect for authority, and cares more for women and wine than he does for his work! Konzen was the least problematic of the group but he still was no joy to have around. I know he is your nephew and all, and I beg your forgiveness but Konzen also deserved the sentence of banishment for his rebellion. Tenpou… while he seemed clam and level headed he has a temper that is at times worse than that of Kenren! Need I remind the counsel what occurred between Tenpou and this very counsel regarding Nataku? He outright defiled the court, rebelled against us, and was on the verge of treason- him and his friends! And that beast Goku… well I think we all know why he was banished from the heavens. They made their own choice and had to suffer the consequences of those choices." 

"Thank you for the history lesson Gildon," Bosatsu said sarcastically as she pulled her hair back and tied it. "I fail to see how that has any bearing on this discussion at hand." 

"Are you serious!? It has every bearing in the world! They were banished; they were never suppose to return! And now Yurru goes and finds a way to bring them back. How did he do it? Why does he want them back? What impact could this have if they all end up back in the heavens?"

"Well Gildon, the only way that I know to find the answer to those questions is to wait and let things play out- let it run the course and we sit back and observe. Then we shall learn the true nature of this."

Gildon stood there in dumbfounded silence, unable to believe what he was hearing. 

"Merciful Goddess, Gildon does have a point. There was a reason they were sent to earth… they are not fit be gods or to dwell here. Allowing them to return could cause more upheavals, both in heaven and on the earth."

"Even us gods are bound by certain rules and limits. Yurru brought Kenren back- for whatever reason. To send him back now may do even more damage in the long run," Bosatsu said as she stood slowly. "You all must remember why we the gods exist in heaven. It is not to look down on them, to pity them, control them, punish them, or even to shape their future. It is to watch over them, to teach them and be taught by them. We have had our time of teaching these four, now perhaps, it is their time to teach us something." 

The Merciful Goddess looked around the Great Hall, smiled then sat back down. Silence filled the room and the full impact of her words sank in with everyone gathered there. After a time she laughed softly, breaking the silence.

"So it is settled then. Kenren will remain… as will Konzen, Tenpou, and even Goku should they make the journey as well."

With that, the great meeting of the Heaven's was finished and everyone was dismissed. So it happened that Kenren returned to the heavens, once more filling the role of General of Heaven's Army. It was good to be back and for the most part, they seemed glad to have him back as well- especially his men who had been without a leader during his absence. One day shortly after his return, they held a celebration in the Planning Hall, to celebrate the return of their general. Long into the night the drinking, stories, and talk lasted. Kenren looked around the room, these were the men he a trained with, fought with, and even bled with at times. He had been away for so long it seemed; and now he was finally back… and yet, something still did not seem quite right.

"Kenren… Kenren, what's the matter?'

Kenren looked up from his glass of rice wine he was holding. He had gotten lost in his thought again and totally forgotten about the celebration. 

"Nothing Ryo… just, remembering some things," He said as he downed the glass and smiled at his friend. 

"You miss them don't you? You miss him."

Kenren turned at looked at Ryo then turned back and poured another glass of wine.

"Come on Kenren, don't act dumb with me. You miss him… Tenpou… you miss him don't you?" 

"I miss them all… Konzen, Goku, Tenpou… of course I miss them."

"Ah…." Ryo said thoughtfully. "Though, you miss Tenpou the most. Right?"

"Ryo, just what are you getting at?" Kenren asked as he set the glass down, his voice raised slightly in that tone that said he was starting to get annoyed.

"Oh come on Kenren, don't act like it's a big secret or anything. I know how close the two of you are. You and Tenpou are like a hand and a glove, you are not complete without the other. You are like lov…"

"Shut up!" Kenren spat, cutting his friend off. "You speak of things you have no clue about Ryo, and that always gets you into trouble."

"Please… give it a rest Kenren. You can't hide it."

Kenren slammed down the glass, shattering it on the table and grabbed hold of Ryo's jacket. The others in the room turned around as dead silence filled the room. Kenren glared at Ryo, his ebony eyes boring into those blue eyes.

"Shut your stinking mouth Ryo" Kenren spat as he lifted the man off the floor by the front of his jacket. "Do you understand? You talk like a crazy man. You don't think things through and it makes you look like an idiot, like right now. So I suggest you keep your moth shut about things you have no clue about. Understand?" 

"Yeah… whatever" Ryo muttered sarcastically.

Kenren glared at him then shoved him back against the wall, then let go, letting him fall to the floor as he turned, grabbed his cloak off the chair and left.  
He walked down the hall, descended the marble stairs and walked across the courtyard. Stopping under the large cherry tree, he looked up at the strong branches and the tiny delicate flowers as his mind drifted back to another time, long ago. 

He and Tenpou were there under the very same tree. Out in the courtyard his men were celebrating another great victory and, as usual, Kenren was not with them. Instead, he was sitting up in his tree, a glass of wine in his had as the tiny pink petals fell like snow to the ground. 

"Do all Generals usually celebrate their great victories in solitude?"

Kenren looked down to see Tenpou standing there. He smiled at his friend as he looked back up into the branches over his head. 

"Eh, you know I don't care a thing about the glory of battle Tenpou- to be able to survive and return home is enough for me."

"Yes… I know" Tenpou said with a laugh. "Kenren is known for his distaste of crowds and celebrations… and also for his fondness of a certain friend."

Kenren looked down again, his eyes meeting Tenpou's.

"Now why bring this up again, eh? Let them talk… that's all it is, talk. The heavens are no different than any other place- gossip is always best when its of the forbidden kind. Let them talk and don't worry about them Tenpou."

"I do worry though, but not for my sake Kenren… but yours."

"Come again?"

"Kenren you know I think of you as my brother, and I know you feel the same for me… but these rumors, this gossip… I worry for your sake, what it will do to your reputation. Personally I could care less what they think about me… but I can not stand the thought of our friendship blackening your name in any way." 

Kenren looked at his friend like he was insane. Swinging his legs around he jumped down and walked over to his friend.

"Tenpou, do you really think I would let something like gossip ruin a friendship as strong as ours? We both know what they say is crap, we know that and most others will see it as that as well. Those who don't… they don't deserve any concern on our part, they aren't worth the effort."

Kenren walked over and put his elbow on Tenpou's shoulder and laughed.

"The best way to fight rumors is to ignore them no? So that is what we shall do. Oh hey, Tenpi… you got a lighter on you?"

Tenpou laughed and tossed his lighter to Kenren as the two walked off, blowing clouds of smoke as they went.

Kenren blinked hard as the memory faded and he walked over to the tree, running his fingers over the bark slowly.

"Tenpou… Konzen…. Goku… I wish you guys were here…"

Translations for Kenren's Song:

Even on a lonely night,  
When you wander afraid,  
You may be alone now, but  
Your feet can take you  
However far you want to go, so

I wish for you  
To have the strength  
To make it through this world,  
So open up your mind,  
And you'll be able to see.

And you'll be able to find all that is love...


	6. Chapter 6

Over a week had passed since Gojyo had died, and still the Sanzo party had not moved on, partly because no one felt like moving on just yet, even Sanzo, and partly because of the string of bad weather that had settled over them. For the last three days it had been nothing but rain, even if they had wanted to get moving there was no way Hakuryu would be able to get them through the thick mud and flooded areas. Like it or not, they were stuck there. As low as their current moods were, the rain only deepened their feelings of pain and loss. Sanzo smoked so much he had created his own fog. Goku moped around the small room at the inn, barely eating. And Hakkai….he did his best to ignore the pain by keeping busy, but the long days stuck in the tiny room left him plenty of opportunities to remember. 

"I'm going out for a bit" Hakkai said as he stood from his spot by the window. 

"Umm Hakkai? It's pouring outside" Goku said as he looked up from his spot on the bed.

"I don't care. I need to get out for a bit. I'll be fine," he said as he pulled on his rain coat and headed out. "Hakuryu, stay here."

The tiny dragon lifted his head from the pillow he had been curled up on, chirped softly then curled back up asleep. Hakkai left and was soon fading away down the street, out of sight. 

"Oh Sanzo, do you think we should go after him?" Goku asked as he put his elbows on his knees and stared across the room at the monk.

"Pfft, let him do what he wants… not like we can do anything to stop him." 

Sanzo pulled out another cigarette from his half empty pack as he stared out the window at the steady rain. Goku fell back on the bed, staring at the ceiling as he slowly drifted to sleep to the sound of the rain.

Meanwhile, Hakkai continued to walk down the streets. The raincoat and hood helped some but the wind still managed to blow rain into the coat. Shivering slightly, he pulled the hood further over his head as he trudged on. He felt cold and empty inside yet there was a pain steadily growing in his chest. The pain and emptiness of loss… he had not felt it this keenly since he had lost Kannan all those years ago. This was not the same, and yet, in a way, it almost was. When he had lost Kannan he had lost the one true love of his life, it drove him to madness. Now, after losing a close friend and companion like Gojyo he again felt that emptiness threatening to swallow him up. Stopping for a moment under a store front, Hakkai closed his eyes as the memories flashed before him. He saw them again.. Kannan and Gojyo… memory after memory appearing then fading away. Shaking his head he opened his eyes and sighed. 

Just then, something caught his eye. He saw something… someone moving down the alley way. Turning he peered through the rain, staring hard at the figure. Suddenly it stopped and turned to face him. Hakkai gasped at the face he saw there and started running forward. The figure turned and walked further down the alley way and turned onto a back steet, Hakkai following. When he turned the corner, Hakkai saw the cloaked figure standing there at the dead end, its back to him. Slowly he approached, his breathing short and quick, his legs trembling slightly. Could it be? Could he have really seen what he thought he saw?

"K… Kannan?" he whispered hoarsely at the figure.

Reaching out a trembling hand, Hakkai put his on the figure's shoulder and slowly pulled them around facing him. The hood fell back, revealing short silvery hair which hung in wet clumps around a pale face, two bright eyes peering back at him- one green, the other gold. Hakkai dropped his hand, the disappointment showing on his face.

"Sorry" he muttered half to himself half to the stranger. "I… I thought you were someone else," he said as he turned to start back.

"Someone else… that you lost maybe?" the stranger asked after him, causing Hakkai to stop in his tracks. "Great loss is often the hardest to get over… indeed, sometimes it is impossible."

Hakkai turned and stared at the silver haired stranger as he spoke.

"You have the face of death" he said as she stared at Hakkai, his eyes shining brightly. "Death you have known and death you have dealt many times over. Death walks hand in hand with your life. They must have been very close to you, these people you have lost if you mourn them so deeply."

"More than you can know" Hakkai muttered bitterly.

"More than I can know… that must be some great loss, for I have known a fair deal of it myself over my many years." The stranger turned his back to Hakkai slightly as he continued to speak. "It's hard isn't it, to keep on living when those we care about the most have already departed for a better place? It is natural to want to follow and be with them again. Am I right?" he asked as he looked over his shoulder to Hakkai. 

"Fairly right" he said in a disgusted voice- the last thing he wanted to do was talk about his painful past and memories with this creepy stranger. 

"I know what you really are boy. It is said that the one who bathes in the blood of a thousand demons will become a demon themselves. Those cuffs on your left ear… I know what they are. They are demon power limiters. As a human you hunted and slaughtered the demons until you yourself became the very creature you so hated and loathed. Demons are the ones who took them from you aren't they? How hard it must be for you, to know you have become the very thing you once hunted with such passion." The stranger laughed softly. "I pity you boy."

"I do not ask for your pitsy" Hakkai said harshly, his fists clenched at his sides. "Nor do I ask for your judgment or lectures old man!"

Hakkai turned his back on the man and started walking away.

"Be careful what you wish and long for, lest it come true," the man said simply as the rain stopped. 

Hakkai stopped for a moment, glanced over his shoulder at the man standing there, that un-nerving smile on his face, his two tone eyes staring into his. Hakkai shuddered slightly and turned back and left the alley way, his head throbbing slightly. 

A few hours later he was back in the room with Sanzo and Goku, neither of them saying anything as they sat around the table. 

"I'm bored" Goku said with a sigh. "I know! Lets play Mahjong! I'll go get the…" his voice trailed off as he realized they didn't have the four players they needed. 

Goku looked uneasily from Sanzo to Hakkai, who stood, pushing his chair back from the table.

"I am going to go lay down… I'm not feeling too well" he said as he walked to one of the beds and fell onto it exhausted.

"Stupid monkey!" Sanzo growled as he his Goku with his fan.

"Ouch, what did I do?" Goku cried as he rubbed his head. "I didn't think it…."

"Exactly, you didn't think!" Sanzo said with a growl.

"Sorry…" 

Sanzo and Goku sat at the table in silence, Sanzo finishing off his last pack of cigarettes, Goku staring off into space, as Hakkai slept fitfully on the bed nearby. 

Hakkai awoke with the rising sun to find Sanzo sitting in the window staring out across the town. The open window allowed the cool morning breeze to blow in, sending Sanzo's golden hair dancing as the smoke from his cigarette trailed in spirals into the air. Birds sang in the distance as the dew drops clung to the branches of the tree outside the window. Hakkai sat there a moment, his eyes scanning the room, looking at Goku who laid on the matt on the floor, sprawled out, snoring loudly as his stomach growled. 

"That was quite the dream…" Hakkai whispered as he thought back. "That stranger… he seemed so real…" Shaking his head he got out of the bed and stretched, his back popping slightly as he did so. Sanzo turned and looked at him as he flicked the cigarette out the window. 

"Couldn't sleep?" Hakkai asked as he walked over and looked out the window himself.

"You could say that," Sanzo muttered as he took out another cigarette. "Seems that you have the same problem." 

"Yeah… can't seem to sleep much these last few nights," Hakkai muttered as he ran his hand through his hair.

"The dreams keeping you awake." 

Hakkai and Sanzo looked at each other. That was more of a statement then a question and Hakkai just nodded slightly, 

"It will pass in time Hakkai."

"Like you're one to talk Sanzo," Hakkai thought to himself. "How many nights have you woken in a cold sweat, unable to sleep because of the memories of your past?" 

He looked at his friend and smiled simply, knowing there was no point getting into it with Sanzo.

"It will," he said simply then turned and made his way to the door.

"Where are you going?" 

"Going to get some supplies… I wont be long, don't worry." 

Hakkai held up his arm as Hakuryu flew over and landed on his shoulder, chirping softly and nuzzling him. They left the in and made their way down the streets, weaving in and out of the crowds, picking up a few supplies here and there. All went well, the day was bright and clear, a cool breeze was blowing, and children were running up and down the streets laughing and playing. Hakkai walked down the street, a couple bags in his arms as Hakuryu flew a little ways behind, following closely, chirping happily as they made their way back.

"Ah, now we have you Sanzo Ikkou!" a voice from behind laughed menacingly. 

Hakkai turned around, the bags of groceries and supplies still in his arms. Before him stood a group of rather angry looking demons brandishing an array of swords and weapons. 

"Oh dear, I'm afraid you are mistaken my friends," Hakkai said in his calm voice, that smug grin on his face as Hakuryu laded on his shoulder. "As you can see, I am only one of the Sanzo-Ikkou.

"Where are the others?!"

"Not here… obviously," Hakkai stated with a laugh.

"Are you mocking us?" one of the demons shouted. 

"Hummm that is the question now isn't it?"

"Enough! You are going to tell us where the sutra scriptures are or you will die!"

"Oh my, that seems a bit harsh doesn't it?" Hakkai said with a slight chuckle as he dropped the bags, the white glow growing brighter around his hands as the demons began to charge. He made quick work of them, leaving their bodies scattered across the streets where they fell. When the charge stopped, Hakkai stood there, a smug grin on his face as he looked at the few remaining demons.

"You are indeed as strong as the rumors and legends say, but you are no match for us!" one of the demons laughed.

"Is that so? I have yet to see your full show of strength but so far I cannot say I am very impressed."

The demons all began to laugh, raising their weapons in the air as they started to shout and chant. Hakkai stood there, listening, trying to make out what it was they were saying. His eyes went wide as he realized they were chanting the name 'Zocho' over and over again.

"Zocho?" Hakkai thought to himself. "Not Zocho the Death Dealer… one of the four great guardians of the heavens and earth, the demon slayer who, legend says has turned oceans red with the blood of the demons he slew…."

Hakkai's eyes grew wider and his face paled as before him appeared a figure that was frightening in and of himself. This man, if indeed it was even human, towered above even the tallest of the demons. Long black hair hung down to his shoulders, pale skin and icy blue eyes sent a shiver through Hakkai as he stared. He wore old military clothes: black boots, dark pants with a gold belt, and a black button up shirt with a black leather jacket. Around his wrists were manacles, the thick chain between them broken and hanging down several inches from each one. In his hand was a large silver sword, the handle ebony with silver inlays and a silver hand-guard. He lifted his head, looking at Hakkai with those icy blue eyes that sent a chill through his entire body. 

Zocho turned, his eyes falling on the few remaining demons that stood behind him. An evil grin spread across his face as he licked his lips and jumped upon the closest Youkai, snuffing out his life in one movement of his hands. Hakkai stood and watched in horrified wonder.

"Zocho… the destroyer of the demons…" Hakkai thought with a shiver. "They knew they were summoning their death yet they did so- that is how desperate they are to be rid of us and to obtain the sutra scriptures."

The dark figure turned, the body of the Youkai in his hands dropping to the ground as he faced Hakkai, his hands along with his clothes splattered with blood. Fear gripped Hakkai's heart for a brief moment as the thought crossed his mind that there was no way he would be able to defeat Zocho on his own… unless…Hakuryu swooped down chirping, causing Hakkai to looked up. 

"Go find Sanzo my friend," he said to the small white dragon. "Find Sanzo and Goku and bring them here... go now. I couldn't live with myself if you were hurt my friend." 

Hakuryu chirped one last time then flew up and over the rooftops, back towards the inn. Hakkai turned back and faced Zocho who was standing there grinning wickedly. Slowly, without a word, Hakkai reached up, his fingers brushing against the cuffs on his left ear. 

"Prepare to die you foolish demon," Zocho laughed wickedly as he swung his sword and started walking towards Hakkai.

Slowly, almost methodically, Hakkai removed each ear cuff, one at a time, letting them drop to the ground, the soft clanging barely audible above the laughter. At first there was nothing, and then suddenly, it hit him, sending his head back with a painful popping sound as he dropped to his knees. With his head and back arched back, arms stretched down at his sides, fits clenched tightly, Hakkai let out a blood chilling howl- a mix of pain, madness, and power. 

Another wave passed through his body as he doubled over, head down almost to the ground, hands and arms over his head. Zocho stood there in wonder as he watched the transformation take hold. The short black hair grew longer, falling down around his face and shoulders. The hands holding his head grew thinner, long youkai claws becoming visible. From under the wild hair, long, pointed youkai ears appeared. Along the pale skin, up the arms, around the fingers, across his back and chest, and even winding up and across his face deep green vine tattoos spread. Lifting his head slowly, Hakkai looked across the small gap to Zocho with his bi-colored eyes, one golden then other green. A wicked grin spread across Hakkai's face, tugging at the corners of his lips as he turned and fully faced his opponent as a wind kicked up, blowing through his hair and blowing back his unbuttoned shirt, revealing even more winding vine tattoos.

"So the demon shows his true form," Zocho said with a grin as he gripped his sword tighter and glared at Hakkai. "This is going to be fun!"

"Indeed," Hakkai simply, his voice deep and cruel.

Zocho let out a cry as he charged, his sword raised, ready to cut his opponent in half, but he never even reached his target. A bright light blinded him, knocking him back, sending him sliding across the cobble stone street, slamming into the wall. Hakkai lowered is arms and stood there as Zocho staggered to his feet, brushing off the dust and chips of stone off his coat as he bent over and picked up his sword again. Again he charged and Hakkai let loose his Chi power again, but this time Zocho was expecting and managed to dodge it just barely. He swung at Hakkai, barely missing him. As he staggered forward from the force of his missed swing, Hakkai brought his knee up into his stomach hard.

Zocho caught himself against the wall and turned fast, bringing his sword down. Hakkai reached up and caught the sword in mid air, his hand around Zocho's wrist. His other hand shot out, too fast to even see, and wrapped around his neck. For a long while they stood there, Hakkai's grip tightening as Zocho dropped the sword, his breath growing fainter as Hakkai's grip tightened even more. A grin spread across his face as Hakkai slowly let go of his hand and pushes him up against the wall, both of Zocho's hands trying to pry his hand away.

A wicked grin spread across Hakkai's face as he licked his lips slightly and laughed. Then something happened that he wasn't expecting. Zocho laughed and pulled his right arm back, punching Hakkai hard in the stomach, causing him to release his hold as he sank to the ground on his hands and knees. Zocho stood there rubbing his neck slightly as he laughed.

"You pathetic piece of trash! Did you honestly think you could defeat me so easily? I am Zocho the Demon Hunter! You were a fool to think you could defeat me!"

Hakkai looked up at him as he got back to his feet, knowing this was not going to be an easy fight, even in his youkai form. As he moved the stabbing pain told him more than a few ribs had been broken. Wiping a trickle of blood from his lips Hakkai stood and faced Zocho, releasing a energy ball which knocked him back into the wall. Hakkai charged, aiming another ball of energy at him but Zocho easily dodged it and turned, bringing his sword down hard. The blade pierced Hakkai's shoulder as a wicked grin spread across his face, which was leering down close to Hakkai's. Dropping to his knees as a cry escaped his lips, Hakkai's eyes, gold and green, opened wide in surprise and pain. Zocho stood, yanking the sword back.

"Pathetic!" He spat at Hakkai as he knelt there, hand to his shoulder, gasping for breath. "You actually thought you could defeat me?"

Hakkai looked up at him as his hand, stained red with his own blood, slipped down. Slowly he pushed himself up and staggered to his feet.

"You still think you can defeat me?" laughed Zocho. "I don't know whether to admire your determination or pity you for it!" 

"I ask for neither admiration nor pity… I ask only for the chance to live my life in peace!"

The two stood there facing each other for a moment. Zocho gripped his sword as blood trickled down from the gash in his forehead. Hakkai stood there, breathing heavy, his torn shirt soaked with blood from his shoulder. Neither spoke for a long while then Hakkai, without a word, knelt back down, placing his left hand on the broken cobble stone road. 

"What's the matter demon? Giving up already?" Zocho laughed wickedly as he lowered his sword and looked down at Hakkai. "You were easier to break than I thought from that show you put on at first."

Hakkai didn't respond, his eyes closed as a hint of a smile played at the corners of his lips ever so slightly. He opened his eyes and looked up at Zocho, his golden eye catching every moment of Zocho's face, his artificial eye seeing nothing but blackness. It was then that it happened, the vine tattoos that wound their way over his entire body, began to spread across the cobblestones towards Zocho. Like winding spider's webs they snaked across the stones. Zocho stood, frozen for a moment in wonder and surprise as what was happening. 

That moment hesitation was what Hakkai was counting on. The instant the first vine touched his boot it wrapped itself around his foot, snaking its way up his leg. In a matter of seconds several of the vines were winding up both of his legs, rendering him unable to move or flee. Lifting his head, a chillingly sadistic grin on his face, Hakkai looked up at him.

"Who's the pathetic one now Zocho?"

In that brief moment, Hakkai's memory flashed back to the last time he had released his Youkai powers. It had been to stop Goku when he had gone berserk in the village. That encounter had almost cost Hakkai his life and his sanity. Faintly he could hear Sanzo's warning again echoing in his mind: "I shouldn't have to tell you this, but I will. Don't take off your limiters unless you absolutely have to. With the minus wave infecting everything, just releasing your Youkai powers might make you susceptible to it. You're not like Goku, Hakkai... If you lose yourself even once… there's no guarantee you'll come back."

Hakkai shook his head and the voices faded and he started to laugh wickedly. Standing suddenly, yanking his arm back hard, the vines which remained connected to his body ripped from the cobblestones, yanking Zocho down to the ground with a sickening sound as his head struck the pavement. Lowering his hands Hakkai approached him, the vines that had been there a moment before, now vanishing. Standing there, scowling down at the groaning figure before him Hakkai kicked him, hard, flinging him several feet back into the wall. Again and again he kicked Zocho, who lay there moaning in agony. Stopping for a moment Hakkai bent down and grabbed his opponent, dragging him to his feet, hand around his neck. Again the vines wound their way around his throat, tightening slightly each time they wrapped around.

"You are going to die Zocho. You do realize that don't you?"

"N…never" Zocho gasped. "You will never… defeat me! I… will get… the scripture…"

"No, you won't" Hakkai said simply as the vines pulled tight around his throat cutting off his breathing.

He stood there, pinning Zocho against the wall, as his breath started to fade. Hakkai was unaware that they were no longer alone.

Hakuryu had flown back to the inn and after some incessant chirping and dive bombing persuaded Sanzo and Goku to follow him. He lead them back to the spot where Hakkai and left, yet there was no sign of him. The bags of dropped groceries still lay on the streets. It was the blinding flash of Hakkai's Chi that lead them down the alley way and to the sight which was now before them.

Goku stood, remembering all too well the time he had seen Hakkai's Youkai form when they were trapped in that alter demission years ago. He also knew that the last time he had gone berserk, Hakkai had to become like this just to try and stop him from destroying everything and everyone around him. He shivered slightly as he stood there beside Sanzo, who was even more shocked.

Sanzo had never seen Hakkai's demon form before- had never been around the two previous episodes and could not believe what his eyes were telling him was real. Quiet, calm, peace-keeping Hakkai had turned into this… this demon? He stared at his friend, his eyes following the twining wine tattoos down his arm and fingers.

"H…his eyes…" he breathed softly as Goku looked up at him and nodded.

"I know… they are gold, just like mine. Well, the one is anyways..." 

"So this is Cho Hakkai's true form…" Sanzo said as a deep chill wash over him, making the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end.

They watched as Hakkai tightened his hold on Zocho's throat, the vines disappearing. With a wicked grin and laugh he slung him away, his broken body skidding across the stones for some distance, right past where Sanzo and Goku stood. Hakkai turned and walked towards them, his eyes fixed on Zocho.

"H….Hakkai?" Goku said softly as he took a step away from Sanzo and towards Hakkai.

Hakkai turned and looked at him with those piercing eyes as he walked by. He swung his arm back, shoving Goku back into the wall as he walked past, never blinking. Sanzo grabbed his arm as he passed, and yanked him back slightly. 

"Hakkai, snap out of it! It's us!"

He turned, gripping Sanzo's wrist as the vines began to snake their way up his arm. Sanzo took a step back as his eyes went wide in fear and surprise. At the last possible moment he yanked his hand away as Hakkai pulled his arm back, punching him hard in the stomach. 

"H…Hak…kai…" Sanzo gasped as he sank to the ground and laid there choking and coughing.

Hakkai looked down at him and grinned sadistically, stepped over him and continued on to Zocho, who was laying motionless on the ground underneath the debris from the wall. He looked down at hum and reached down, pulling the debris away then flipped him over onto his back. Hakkai leaned over and looked at him and laughed.

"So who is the tough one now Zocho the not so powerful demon slayer? Looks like you are on the losing end!" He laughed as he lifted his hand, razor sharp claws gleaming in the sunlight as he swung, ripping the black shirt, spatters of blood speckling his face. Again and again he swung, his laughter growing more and more sadistic as he went. 

Goku staggered to his feet as Sanzo knelt beside him, both of them staring in horror at what they were watching.

"He's gone berserk…" Sanzo muttered darkly.

"No… not Hakkai… Hakkai no!" Goku shouted as he ran towards Hakkai, Sanzo reaching for him to stop him.

Goku ran up behind his friend, who had totally lost all control as he took swipe after swipe at the already lifeless body before him. Goku stepped forward and grabbed his upraised hand as it fell. Hakkai turned around, so fast Goku could barely see him move. 

"Hakkai…. Hakkai its me, Goku… Im your friend remember?" 

Hakkai glared at him, a sneer on his face his eyes narrowed as he licked his lips slightly.

"Come on Hakkai… snap out of it. Let's go back to the inn… Hakkai?" 

In a flash, Hakkai's hands were around Goku's neck, the vine tattoos creeping up his neck and face. Goku tried to pry his hands away but it was no use, he was just to strong. He felt himself being lifted up as his feet dangled in the air, his lungs burning as everything started to go fuzzy and dark. Then he heard something, and blood curdling cry from Hakkai and he felt himself fall to the ground as his lungs sucked in the cool air. Lifting his head he looked up at Hakkai.

Hakkai dropped to his knees, his head and back arched back as he gave another agonizing cry. Behind him stood Sanzo, both his hands firmly placed on either side of Hakkai's head, his brow tight with concentration. Again and again Hakkai cried out, yet Sanzo's hands remained fixed, until Hakkai, slumped forward and fell face down on the stone road. Hakkai was silent and still as Sanzo removed his hands and stood, staring down at the broken and bloodied form infront of him.

"Damn you Hakkai" he muttered as he bent down, grabbed his arm, and pulled him up.

Goku stood there staring in dumbfounded silence.

"Wha… what just happened. How did he….?" His voice trailed off as he looked and saw the three metal cuffs were back on Hakkai's ear. Somehow, Sanzo had done that, just as Sanzo had done for him at least once before. Goku followed, limping slightly as they made their way back to the inn.


	7. Chapter 7

Ok, for the first time in this story, though probably not the last, I have to put up a warning. This chapter has scenes of torture along with some bad language. If that sort of thing offends you consider yourself fore-warned. While it is not overly bad or detailed, it could be enough to bother or offend some so I wanted to make this statement at the beginning. Thank you and please let me know what you think of chapter 7!

Oh and you know how this goes- I don't own Saiyuki Characters.

Time passed slowly in the heavens as everyone became adjusted to having War general Kenren back among them. Kenren was, of course, glad to be back- it was what he had wanted… and yet, he could not help but feel all too keenly that something was missing. One day, much like the numerous days that had already passed, Kenren was wandering around the palace, and remembering for the first time in quite a while, what it felt like to be absolutely bored. He stood on one of the bridges overlooking the gardens as a voice called out to him from behind. 

"General Kenren! There you are." 

Turning slowly he looked over his shoulder to see Yuuru walking towards him.

"Yuuru.." Kenren said with a slight nod as he turned back and looked across the flowers, rocks, and waterfalls of the gardens.

"What's the matter Kenren? And don't say nothing's wrong… its obvious something is bothering you. It's written plainly on your face." 

"I was just thinking…" he muttered as he lit the cigarette held between his lips, "what happened to Nataku, I have not see the kid around since I've returned and no one speaks of him. What happened?"

"There is good reason no one speaks of War Prince Nataku anymore. The Nataku you knew those years ago is no more." 

"What?! He's dead?"

"No… at least not physically. Yet mentally… he is dead. Prince Nataku has been in a catatonic state since they day you and the others, disappeared. There has been no change in him since then."

Kenren stared at Yuuru for a moment in dumbfounded silence. Then, turning quick, he started to run towards the palace, heading right for Prince Nataku's chamber. Running past the bewildered guards he pushed open the large mahogany doors and rushed in, only to stop dead in his tracks as he stared in horror. Before him sat Prince Nataku, looking just as he had the last time he had seen the 'puppet assassin.' He sat there on the golden throne that was too large for his small, youthful frame, and stared straight ahead, eyes blazing and piercing like razors. Yet there was a lifeless stare to the eyes. Nataku sat there frozen, unmoving, unblinking, lifeless. Kenren stood there and stared in shock, hearing foot steps behind him and then that all too familiar voice.

"It's pitiful to see the War Prince in such a state is it not, General Kenren?" 

It was Ro, one of the other war generals and a long time opponent of Kenren's. Ro liked nothing more than to challenge Kenren whenever he could, most often in front of others to ensure Kenren's response to his challenges. He stood there in the doorway, arms folded across his chest, a smug grin on his face as he leaned against the wall slightly, legs crossed casually. 

"What's the matter General? You're not thrilled to see an old friend?"

"With friends like you who has a need for enemies Ro?" Kenren spat back as he glared at his long time opponent.

"My, my, my, such harsh words Kenren. I know you have always been partial to the little brat...even stood up against the high counsel and went against their orders to send Nataku to the front lines. I thought the time away would have cleared your head of such ridiculous thoughts… sadly I see I am mistaken. You are the same as always, weak, pitiful, and not worthy to be a General of Heaven!"

"The only weakling I see is you Ro. You and the vast majority of the other so-called-generals, you who hide behind Prince Nataku and let him do all the work while you get the power and glory. You send him into battle countless times and stand back and watch him fight. He comes back time and time again beaten and bloody, barely alive, while you all come back without so much as a scratch! It's sickening. It is you who does not deserve to a General of Heaven, Ro!" 

"Be careful what you say Kenren… your little friend Tenpou is not here to watch your back for you," Ro said with a sneer. "Nataku does what he is told. He is a heretic, a creature that should not even be alive… yet he has his uses and has proven his worth to us as the assassin. He has served his purpose. It was Nataku himself who did this," Ro said waving his hand towards where Nataku sat. "It is not our doing."

Kenren glared at Ro, his fingers closing around the grip of the long pistol at his belt. He could not believe what he was hearing- they had always used Nataku, treated him like a weapon of war rather than a living breathing being. Heretic or no, he hated seeing the kid abused the way they abused him. 

"You son of a…" 

"Careful general… think before you act, it could cost you."

Kenren glared at him and laughed mockingly as he drew the long pistol, leveling the barrel at Ro as he stood there.

"Pulling a gun on a General of Heaven's Army is a major offence Kenren… it's going to cost you." 

"Like I give a damn… you make me sick listening to you talk. It makes me sick knowing what you have done to that kid, and even more so knowing that you could care less what happens to him as long as it helps make your pompous ass look better!" 

Ro stood there, his eyes boring into Kenren's as they stared at each other over the barrel of the pistol. Just then the door behind Kenren flew open and several of the guards ran in. In a matter of minutes, Kenren was down on the floor, one of the guards kneeling down on his back as they bound his hands. Kenren didn't go down without a fight and two of the guards lay moaning on the floor themselves

"You will regret ever turning on me Kenren," Ro said as he knelt down and sneered down at Kenren as his hands were bound.

Kenren looked up at him, a smug almost amused grin on his face as he was yanked to feet and shoved out the door and down the hallway. As they left the chamber, he took one last look over his shoulder at the still, solitary figure of Nataku.

Ro grinned as followed after Kenren as he was drug down the hall.

"You are still proving useful to me, Naktaku," he said over his shoulder. "Even now you still have some use." 

Kenren felt a blindfold come around his head as everything went black. He felt himself being jostled around and pushed down a long flight of stairs- down to the dungeon. Kenren had always thought it a bit ironic, that even in the heavens there could exist a place so dark and vile as that place. 'Even in heaven things are not perfect,' he had often pondered to himself, and now he was finding himself there once more. 

"Keep moving you scum!" one of the guards yelled as he shoved Kenren hard, making him stumble into the hard stone wall, a groan escaping his lips as his shoulder slammed painfully into the wall. 

Vice-like hands gripped his arms as he was drug along for a bit longer. Finally they stopped as the blindfold was pulled away less than gently. Blinking Kenren looked into the hazy dank light at the grinning face of Ro. He pulled at the ropes that still bound his hand, but to no avail, they had taken every precaution to ensure he couldn't get free. 

"Struggle all you want General Kenren," Ro spat at him as he stood there sneering down at him. "You are mine now… and your precious little Tenpou isn't here to save you this time! I am a compassionate man Kenren, so I offer you this one last chance to atone for your actions, before things have to get ugly. State your loyalty to me Kenren, take my hand and kiss the ring on my finger… and all will be forgiven." 

"Like hell I'm going to kiss your ring you sorry excuse for a war general! I would sooner kiss a rat than your hand!" 

"That… can be arranged," Ro growled as he glared at Kenren and nodded, the guard behind him driving his elbow into Kenren's back, sending him crumpling to the floor.  
"Son… of a… bitch.." Kenren moaned as he rolled onto his side, his hands still bound behind his back, a thin trickle of blood running down through his hair where he had hit his head as he fell. 

"What was that Kenren?" Ro asked mockingly. " I couldn't hear you."

Kenren closed his eyes as he caught his breath again, looking up at Ro with blazing eyes. Ro walked over, glaring down at his opponent a sug look of sheer enjoyment on his face as he drew his leg back and kicked Kenren hard in the ribs, flipping him onto his back. Kenren gasped in pain and groaned, not just from the pain in his ribs but the pain that was radiating from his arms as he laid on the painfully. Again and again Ro kicked him hard, a wicked grin spreading across his face with each kick. 

He stepped back a moment, looking down at the form in front of him. Kenren lay on his stomach once more, his head bent painfully as he looked up at Ro, blood trickling down his chin as he coughed. Resting his head on the cold stone floor, his eyes closed as Ro gave a sharp laugh.

"Beaten already Kenren?" he laughed down at him.

Then something happened the Ro was not expecting. Kenren started to laugh, a soft, gurgling laugh as he lay there, ribs bruised and broken.

"Heh… you are funny Ro, you know that? Really funny…."

"Are you mocking me!?"

"I don't know. Am I?"

Ro let out a cry as he kicked Kenren hard once more in the stomach, causing him to cough up blood.

"You will pay for your insolence Kenren!"

"I look forward to it," he groaned as he closed his eyes, feeling himself being yanked to his feet again.

He bit his lips slightly his head throbbing at the sudden movement, his sides aching as he stood, his weight pressing down all too heavily on his ribs. He winced slightly as Ro walked over and grabbed a handful of his short black hair, pulling his head back in a painful position.

"Don't ever mock me again, Kenren! Ever!" Ro hissed as he shoved Kenren down onto the cold floor once more and bent over

Kenren felt the rope that bound his hands undone as his arms fell to his sides, that burning throbbing sensation immediately sending pain down his arms as the blood began to flow back to his fingers. Lifting his head weakly he looked up at Ro who stood sneering down at him. Splatters of dark red blood speckled the stone around his head from where he had coughed up blood. Ro walked over and knelt down, a sadistic grin on his face.

"Are you ready to cooperate Kenren? You can end this all so easily with just a few words." 

"Go… to hell…" Kenren muttered as he closed his eyes, fighting off the waves of pain that were washing over him, each one more intense than the one before. "There are some things….worth fighting for."

"What are you muttering about now?"

"Things… worth fighting for. Like honor, loyalty, justice, and friendship."

"Ha, those are the things of weaklings," Ro said with a laugh. "Honor comes from within; you find true honor by being the best and the strongest- it is those with power who gain honor and respect! Loyalty is a thing dreams are made of… my loyalty rests within myself and that alone. What is justice, other than mans attempt to make some sense of the crazy world in which we live? I will give the world the justice it needs by dealing in any way I must with those who resist me! And friends, friends are nothing more than baggage that holds us down and keeps up back." Ro leaned over, hands resting on his knees as he spoke softly to Kenren.

"You know, there is a saying in the lower world among the humans. Perhaps you heard it during your absence Kenren. "If you meet the Buddha, kill the Buddha. If you meet your father then kill your father. Only live your life, not bound by anything. Have you heard it Kenren?" 

Kenren looked up at him. He had heard those words from somewhere… but where? Where had he heard that?

"No? Pity," Ro said coldly as he stood and nodded to the guards standing by the door.

They walked over and grabbed Kenren's arms, pulling him to his feet. He winced as they shoved him over to a large wooden post which rose out from the stone floor. Two leather straps hung down from the top of the post. As one of the guards held him, the other pulled the straps down, fastening them around Kenren's wrists. Once his hands were bound they pulled the other end of the straps down hard, pulling his arms up over his head tightly. Kenren groaned, biting his lip to hold it back, determined not to give Ro what he was wanting. They tied the ends of the straps down as Kenren stood there, arms over his head and pulled out to the sides slightly. Ro walked over and grabbed the now stained and dirty shirt and tore it off Kenren's back, the shreds falling to the ground. The way he was standing Kenren's back, shoulders, arms, legs, ribs, and chest were exposed. 

"You can end it all right now Kenren, before it even has to start. Just say the word and its over. Are you ready to be reasonable?"

"I'll be ready on the day you decide to stop being an arrogant ass."

Ro clenched his jaw as he took the long black leather whip from the guard, letting uncoil and the end drop to the floor with a sickening thud. Raising his arm back he paused for a brief moment. 

"You bring this on yourself Kenren," he muttered coldly as he brought the whip down, the black snake curling across Kenren's back, ribs, and chest.

One single cry escaped Kenren's lips at the first blow, but after that, not a sound other than the muffled groans he kept back. Again and again Ro pulled the whip back and let it fall- across the bare skin. Now and then a blow would go astray, striking Kenren on the legs or arms. After a time, Kenren knew he was starting to slip. His body felt numb and he could hardly feel the blows anymore. His vision was blurry and his head was throbbing as he fought to stay conscious, his legs trembling with the effort to keep himself standing.

Slowly his knees buckled as he slumped forward, his weight pulling on his arms and bound wrists painfully, yet he was unable to stand. Finally Ro stopped and handed the whip back to the guard and nodded at the other who walked over to Kenren. The guard un-strapped one hand, leaving Kenren dangling by one arm for a moment then undid the other. As he did so, Kenren sank to the floor, barely catching himself before his head hit as he lay there gasping for breath. Ro stood there, a wicked sadistic grin on his face.

"So this is the mighty General Kenren… pitiful! Who is it you claim loyalty to? You can still end your suffering quickly Kenren, chose your words wisely."

Kenren rolled onto his side, gasping slightly as he looked up at the man standing before him. His back, sides, arms, and even his chest were streaked red by more than two dozen marks. Wave upon wave of pain washed over him as his vision grew even hazier. Still he pushed himself up into a half sitting position as he glared up at Ro.

"My loyalty lies with those who truly care about the lives of all- here in the heavens and down on the world below. My loyalty is with the ones who are fighting for a better future for all, not just for one man or a handful of arrogant men! My loyalty lies with them- Konzen, Tenpou, Goku, Nataku… that is where my loyalty lies."

"You bastard!" Ro cried as he felt his hand fly, hitting Kenren in the jaw, sending him crumpling to the ground as the blackness finally overtook him.

"Leave him… when he awakens he will know all too well what happens to those who betray us!"

They walked out, leaving the beaten and broken form laying on the cold, dirty, stone floor. Water could be heard dripping from one of the numerous cracks in the ceiling, rats could be hear scurrying through the nearby passage ways and behind the wall, and in the distance thunder rumbled ominously. Kenren was oblivious to it all as he drifted into the thick blackness of unconsciousness which swallowed him up, bringing him temporary relief from the pain bur bringing the pain of memories and dreams with it.


	8. Chapter 8

Typical Disclaimer- characters belong to the creator of Saiyuki- not me.

Hakkai dropped to his knees, his head and back arched back as he gave another agonizing cry. Behind him stood Sanzo, both his hands firmly placed on either side of Hakkai's head, his brow tight with concentration. Again and again Hakkai cried out, yet Sanzo's hands remained fixed, until Hakkai, slumped forward and fell face down on the stone road. Hakkai was silent and still as Sanzo removed his hands and stood, staring down at the broken and bloodied form in front of him.

"Damn you Hakkai" he muttered as he bent down, grabbed his arm, and pulled him up. Goku stood there staring in dumbfounded silence. 

"Wha… what just happened. How did he…?" His voice trailed off as he looked and saw the three metal cuffs were back on Hakkai's ear. Somehow, Sanzo had done that, just as Sanzo had done for him at least once before. Goku followed, limping slightly as they made their way back to the inn.

Hakkai lay on the bed, as he had for the last three days, unmoving, lost deep within the twisting blackness of the coma he had fallen into. With each sun rise and with its setting, the hope in Sanzo and Goku's hearts began to fade. They would not give up hope- they had been through hard times themselves and had managed to fight their way back… yet, with every day that passed that hope grew fainter and harder to hold onto. 

Sanzo and Goku had taken the last few days almost as badly as Hakkai had. Goku sat by the bed, hardly ever leaving Hakkai's side as he sat in the chair, leaning forward against the back of the chair. Even food held very little interest for him, and he refused to leave any more than what was necessary. He had even taken to sleeping in the chair or sitting on the floor, leaning back against the bed so he could be there if Hakkai woke up. Sanzo was also taking all this less than well. Since they had gotten back to the inn, he had said nothing once they had taken care of Hakkai. For hours at a time he sat quietly in the chair under the window, smoking several packs in the three days which had passed. 

Hakkai was having his own struggle as well, fighting to free himself from the blackness that had enveloped him since Sanzo had put the limiters back in place. Longer than he could remember all he saw was the thick inky blackness and all he heard was the soft hum of silence buzzing maddeningly in his ears. Then, from the silence he heard a soft voice speaking, calling to him. From the blackness he saw this faint dot of light. Slowly the whisper grew louder and louder as the light began to grow brighter, driving the blackness away. Slowly, Hakkai's eyes fluttered open as he squinted against the light as his eyes adjusted. Blinking, he realized he was lying on his back, on a hard floor as he stared up at a ceiling above him. 

"Welcome back Field Marshal Tenpou," the voice said. 

Lifting his head slightly, Hakkai looked over at who was speaking. The man standing there smiling down at him was tall, well built, with silver hair and… his eyes, one was green the other was blue. It was him… 

"You... the stranger from the alley. It's you!" hakkai exclaimed as he stumbled to his feet and looked around, finding himself standing in what appeared to be a large library. 

"Yes Tenpou, it is I. My name is Yuuru, and I have been looking for you for some time now." 

"Looking for me?" Hakkai blinked in surprised. "And who is Tenpou… I don't know anyone by that name." 

"Yes you do. You are Tenpou. I guess you have no memory of your previous life. You were once the Field Marshal of the Heavens. You were Tenpou Gensui, one of the most powerful in the heavens and loved and respected by many. Do you not remember, Tenpou? Do you not remember your old friends, Konzen, and Kenren? " 

Hakkai stood and looked around him, something seeming very familiar about what he was seeing and hearing. Then suddenly those memories were revealed to him, all of them. He remembered it all- the gardens, this library, and he remember Konzen and Kenren…. He remember his life as Field Marshal Tenpou.

Yuuru smiled slightly as he saw the look spread across Hakkai's face as the memories were made known to him once more.

"You remember don't you? You had the power and authority to make things happen. You were Field Marshal, higher than even General Kenren, and respected by Konzen and others. You were more than the babysitter and peace keeper, you were one the leaders and driving influences of Heaven's army. Instead of breaking up fights between Gojyo and that stupid monkey, you were giving war plans and strategies to your men. Instead of trying to keep the peace with Sanzo, you were ridding the heavens and the lower world of its trouble makers and dangers. Instead of being merely the driver of your group, you were the driving force behind much of what takes place here. This was your life Tenpou, and I offer you the chance to reclaim your old life back."

Silence fell between them for a long while as Hakkai stared in shock at what he was hearing and all the lost and forgotten memories that were now flooding his mind. He could see himself sitting in the very same room, realizing now that this was his own office. He saw himself pouring over old books and scrolls, getting buried in his work and readings. He could see the memories of past battles and victories and some defeats. He saw once more the faces of his friends, Konzen with his perpetual frown, Kenren with his sarcastic 'I don't care' attitude, and finally that little monkey with his never ending smile and boundless energy. He sighed softly… he missed them, missed that life, yet…. He turned and looked over at Yurru.

"Will I have any memory of them, if I chose to come back to this old life of mine?"

"The Sanzo-Ikkou? No, all memories of them will die along with your life as Cho Hakkai. Your life as Tenpou Gensui will be that life, with its own memories."

Hakkai nodded a moment as he turned and slowly walked around the room, his fingers grazing over the stacks of books and papers, scattered on the desk and cascading onto the floor. He stopped, reading the titles, the memories coming back all the stronger. He had been happy as Tenpou, it was a good life… he had his friends, and he liked the way things had been. Turning back to Yurru he smiled.

"I accept your offer Yuuru.. I will take back my life as Tenpou Gensui, and leave behind the life I had as Cho Hakkai."

Yurru smiled slightly. "So be it…" slowly he walked up behind Hakkai, put his arm around him, and put his hand over his face gently. He put his hand over his eyes as he muttered something softly to himself. As he did, Hakkai felt himself start to drift away. His mind grew dark, his vision blurred as his eyes closed and he felt himself sink slowly onto the soft carpet of grass and wildflowers. 

"Go back to them… say your goodbyes" Yurru said to the sleeping Hakkai as he laid him on the floor, between the stacks of books and parchment. "Finish what you have started, and when you awake here with me again, you will never have to leave again, Tenpou." 

Slowly he drifted back into the blackness, and again he heard voices, but it was not the voices of Sanzo and Goku. He heard voices yelling and shouting and the cry of someone in pain. Hakkai heard the sound of a whip cracking again and again, followed by the painful cry of the unlucky person at the end of that whip. Opening his eyes he found himself standing in a long dark corridor standing outside one of the numerous cells that lined the hall. Looking through the bars that made up the upper part of the door, Hakkai peered into the cell, his blood running cold at what he was seeing. A group of three rather angry looking guards stood around a figure that lay unmoving on the stone floor. They took turns kicking the man on the ground again and again in the stomach, back, and ribs. Hakkai saw the bruises and welts that covered his arms, back, and chest and the whip marks across his body. He tried to turn away, not wanting to watch anymore, yet some unseen force kept him there. Hakkai watched as the beating continued, the anger burning inside him. He didn't know who this man was or what he had done, but regardless, he doubted it was worth the extreme punishment being inflicted upon him. As it continued, time seeming to drag painfully, the man looked up from where he lay on the ground, his mouth coated with blood, the stones splattered with it as well. He looked across the cell, right into Hakkai's eyes… those piercing ebony eyes, boring into his green ones, as if to plead for help. Hakkai let out a cry as he pulled the cell door open, the guards instantly on him, grabbing him by the arms, holding him back as he struggled.

Hakkai fought hard as he could as the darkness closed in around him once more, their grip tightening on his arms as he continued to struggle. The voices of the guards faded away, being replaced by two familiar faces.

"Hakkai! Hakkai, snap out of it!" Goku yelled as he pinned Hakkai's arms to the bed. Hakkai had been lost in a feverish sleep for the past two days, with no change until now. 

"Damnit Hakkai… what happened Goku?" Sanzo shouted as he held down Hakkai, who was fighting madly.

"I don't know," Goku gasped slightly. "He had been muttering and talking in his sleep for the last few hours and then just suddenly started- with no warning." 

"Damnit," Sanzo muttered again as he fought with Hakkai. As he wracked his brain, trying to think of what to do, nothing happened that neither of them could have expected. Hakkai's body went rigid as he let out a blood chilling scream, much like he had when Sanzo had place the limiters back on. As Sanzo and Goku struggled to keep him down, there was a cracking noise, of metal snapping and breaking. Looking down Sanzo gasped slightly. "No… it cant be…"

The three metal cuffs on Hakkai's ear, the only thing holding back his Youkai powers, were cracked. In the next instant, as Hakkai let out another cry, the three cuffs shattered, the broken pieces falling onto the bed. The force that shattered the limiters threw Sanzo and Goku back from the bed- Sanzo slamming into the wall, Goku skidding across the floor as Hakkai fell back onto the bed, gasping for breath.

Sanzo was slammed back against the wall his head leaving a slight dent in the plaster as he slumped to the floor, completely knocked out. Goku rolled onto his side, staggering to his feet, his head spinning slightly as he looked over to the bed. His eyes grew wide and his stomach twisted at what he saw. Hakkai lay on the bed, his hands clutching at the sheets, the long fingers and nails of a youkai clearly visible. His hair was longer and wilder, spread out on the pillow… his face dotted with beads of sweat. Across his face, arms, and chest Goku saw the all too familiar vine tattoos as the started to spread across his body. Cautiously Goku made his way back to the bed.

"H…Hakkai…" he said softly, trying to keep hi voice from cracking.

Suddenly, Hakkai's eyes snapped open and looked up and Goku with those piercing eyes- one golden the other still green. Moving so fast he could hardly be seen, he sat up and lunged for Goku, who barely managed to dodge away. Springing from the bed, that wicked grin on his face, Hakkai went after Goku, taking a swipe at him with his claws.

"Sanzo! Hey, Sanzo!" Goku cried as he dodged the blow, summoning his Nyubo Stick. "This is no time for taking a nap, you stupid monk! Wake up damn it!" 

For the next few minutes it was like a game of cat and mouse. One would attack, the other dodging and counter attacking. Goku was fast but he was no match for Hakkai in his Youkai form. He knew he wouldn't be able to hold out much longer if Sanzo didn't wake up soon. Hakkai lunged at Goku, knocking him back against the wall and bent down and picked him up off the ground, by his neck. Lifting him up till his feet were dangling off the ground, he grinned sadistically as Goku struggled to pry his hands away. Goku felt his strength starting to slip away, his lungs burning, screaming for air, as his vision grew blurry.

"Hakkai… don't… do this…." He gasped with the last of his breath.

Just then a single shot ran out, causing them both to turn their heads. There stood Sanzo, dusty powder from the plaster wall coating his robe and hair as he stood there, the pistol aimed up, a bullet hole now in the ceiling.

"Leave the monkey alone, Hakkai," he said as he lowered the gun to his side.

Hakkai sneered, his grip of Goku lightening as he dropped him to the floor. While Goku lay there gasping for breath Hakkai turned and lunged towards Sanzo, with a speed so great he could hardly be seen. In an instant he was standing before Sanzo, who raised the pistol, leveling it right at his chest. The two of them stood there- Hakkai with his arms out slightly, claws ready to swipe at a moment's notice, and Sanzo, pistol aimed for Hakkai's heart, finger on the trigger. Goku staggered to his feet as he stared in horror and surprise at what he saw before him.

"S…sanzo?" 

"Shut up you monkey. I'm busy," Sanso growled as he stared back at Hakkai, his gaze and hand never wavering. "Hakkai and I have some business we need to take care of… isn't that right Hakkai?" 

A slight grin pulled at the corners of the youkai's mouth and he laughed softly,

"Yes, yes we do… Sanzo-sama." 

"Then stop this charade already Hakkai.. it's getting annoying."

"Oh, I'm so sorry to be an inconvenience to you," Hakkai said mockingly. "However, I'm afraid I can't let you go." 

"And I'm afraid I cant let you go on a killing spree," Sanso said as he aimed the banishing gun again. 

"Ummm… Sanzo?" Goku said, his voice cracking somewhat. "Cant you just….you know, but the limiters back on like you did before?"

"I don't think that is an option for us this time Goku. I was only able to create your diadem once… I did the same for Hakkai. I don't think I can do it again…. And his limiters were broken by the force within him. He didn't take them off himself this time." 

" Hah, that's right Son Goku," Hakkai said with an evil laugh. "Sanzo–sama can't stop me this time."

"Don't be too sure about that," Sanzo said as he cocked the gun, his finger starting to slowly squeeze the trigger.

Hakkai just laughed sadistically as he raised his hand, the razor sharp claws ready to swipe. Goku stared in horror, frozen where he was, unable to move. Sanzo slowly squeezed the trigger back, swallowing hard, as a single tear escaped from his eye.

"I made you the promise, Hakkai…. That if it ever came to this I would do what needed to be done," Sanzo said bitterly, fighting the raging emotions he felt inside. 

The single shot ran out and they watched in slow motion as Hakkai flew backwards, falling onto the floor on his back, still and silent. Goku was immediately by his side, yelling his name, again and again and again, to no avail. Hakkai was gone, they had just lost another member of the Sanzo-Ikkou. Goku knelt there next to the still form of their old dear friend, streams of tears running down his face. Sanzo stood where he was, the gun in his hand dropping to the floor with a sickening clang, as he slumped against the wall, his head hanging down. For the first time in longer than he could remember, Sanzo, the great priest and leader of the group, was shedding silent tears.


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer time: I do not belong the characters from Saiyuki- my own characters however belong to me alone- no stealing them!

Tenpou opened his eyes slowly, staring up at the cream colored ceiling above him as he stared into nothing. Slowly his mind started to clear as the darkness finally let go of him. Turning his head he looked around, and realized he was laying on the floor, surrounded by books, rolls of parchment, and old maps and charts. It all looked, slightly familiar to him.

Sitting up he put his hand to his head to try and stop the dull throbbing that still lingered. This was…. This was his room. This was hi study, where he had spent so much of his time lost among these very same books and papers. Countless hours he had spent here planning and mapping out strategies. As he stood, turning around and scanning the room, he heard a voice from behind,

"It's just how you left it is it not, Tenpou?"

"Oh Yuuru, its you…" Tenpou said as he smiled slightly. "Yes… I remember how everything use to be before… before I went away."

The two were silent a moment, Yuuru watching as he continued to scan the room. 

"It's good to be back," Tenpou said with a smile.

"And it is good to have you back with us. You have been missed. Come, the counsel will be thrilled to learn of your return." 

As they walked down the numerous hallways, Tenpou kept looking, kept searching for them- Kenren, Konzen, and Goku. He searched every face they passed, but did not see them anywhere. Feeling somewhat defeated, he followed Yuuru into the Great Hall and walked up, kneeling before the throne where the Merciful Goddess sat.

"Tenpou Gensui, welcome back. It has been a long time since your presence has been with us… it is good to have you back."

"I am overjoyed to be back at last Merciful Goddess," Tenpou said as he knelt before her. He stood to his feet again, Yuuru standing a little ways behind him silently, Ro and Kanzeon Bosatsu's aid standing on either side of her.

"Merciful Goddess, I had one question. Where are Kenren, Konzen, and Goku? I haven't seen them anywhere." 

"ah yes, naturally you wonder where your companions are. I believe Ro is the best to answer that question for you Tenpou Gensui."

Kanzeon smiled slightly as Ro bowed and then turned to Tenpou.

"Konzen and Goku have yet to return. Kenren has returned but is detained at the moment… but do not worry my friend, I do not foresee him being away from us for much longer." 

"Thank you Ro," Tenpou said softly as he bowed slightly. "I trust that you will inform me as soon as he has returned?"

"Of course, the instant he is back you shall be the first to know."

A short time later, Yuuru and Tenpou were leaving the Great Hall and heading back to the East Wing, while Ro made his way back to the dungeon. When they were gone Kanzeon Bosatsu's said turned to her.

"Forgive me Merciful Goddess, but doesn't Ro know where Kenren is?"

"Maybe he does… it is for him to decide what information to disclose. However, it does seem that Tenpou is not satisfied with the answer he has been given. I think things are going to be a bit more interesting around here." 

The days passed slowly, which was just fine for Tenpou. He was glad to be back, back home among his friends… he only wished Kenren, Konzen, and Goku would hurry up and come back soon. 

This day was much like the last few. Tenpou was keeping busy trying to organize his study, yet again. It seemed to be a never ending task- as soon as he would get it organized it seemed a few weeks later it was back to the way it was before. He laughed to himself as he remembered the times his friends had helped him try and get things organized. Goku running back and forth with stacks of books in his arms, Kenren holding his cigarette in one hand and a few books in the other as he reshelfed the numerous volumes, and Konzen being his normal whinny self and complaining more than he was helping. Tenpou smiled as he put the last book on the shelf. Looking around the study he smiled to himself, happy to have accomplished his goal. With the study finally cleaned and organized there wasn't much for him to do so he started walking the grounds, wandering absently, letting his mind wander over whatever paths it wanted and letting his feet lead him where they pleased. 

When finally he did stop, his mind returning the present rather than the past, he blinked. Where was he? Tenpou found himself standing at the top of a dark narrow stairway. He stood there, uncertain of where he was… and then it hit him. This was the passage way that lead down to the dungeons. Tenpou had often pondered this fact, marveling even in the heavens there could still be a need for a place like this. Slowly he descended the stairs, not really knowing why, but going anyways. As he descended the dark wet stairs, he felt this shiver run up his spine as something pricked him at the back of his mind. He saw flashes of a scene, someone being tortured. He could hear the agonizing cries and the chilling sound of a whip. The next flash, he saw the person lift their head, as if to look at him, but at that exact instant the vision faded. Tenpou stopped, his head to his hand as eh stood at the bottom of the stairs. He looked down the narrow corridor, which was lined with three cells on each side. He stood there a moment, staring into the dim hallway, feeling a chill creep over him. Just as he was about to turn and climb the stair out of that place he heard something, a soft groan. Peering into the darkness he couldn't see anything as he slowly walked deeper, going further down the corridor. 

That was when he saw it, and the sight before him made his stop dead in his tracks. There, in one of the far cells, someone was chained against the wall. Tenpou stood there at the barred door and stared at the figure- his shirt had been torn from his back, only the small cuff of the sleeve still remained around his wrist where the manacles were clasped. Numerous bruises, welts, and whip marks covered his back, arms and chest. His pants too were torn and bloodied by the occasional lash mark. Short black hair covered his head which hung limply at his chest as he stood there, his weight being supported by his chained arms.

Tenpou's hand slipped into the pocket of his coat, his fingers closing around the ring of keys there. Almost without thinking he pulled the keys out, finding his master key, which unlocked every cell door and shackle in that place, and unlocked the door. As he stepped in he stopped, looking once more at the figure. He wasn't moving but seemed to still be breathing. 

"What you did to deserve this kind of treatment I do not know… but regardless, no person should have to suffer like this," Tenpou muttered half to himself as he reached a hand out towards one of the shackles.

In the instant his fingers touched the cold mental the vision flashed before his eyes again, only this time it didn't stop. As the figure started to lift his head the vision stayed and Tenpou gasped as he saw the face.

"No… Kenren!" he breathed hoarsely.

As he unchained the shackles, he caught the limp body as he stank to the ground. Kneeling down on the filthy wet floor, Tenpou looked down and gasped- it was Kenren… He had found him.

"Kenren! Kenren answer me!"

Slowly, Kenren's eyes opened slightly as he looked up at Tenpou. His face was bruised and there was a trickle of dried blood running down the side of his face from a gash somewhere in his hair. He was thin and weak… it was obvious he had lost a lot of blood and hadn't eaten in a while. Forcing a weak smile he looked up at Tenpou.

"You… you found me. I knew you would…."

"Its alright Kenren… come on, let's get you out of here," Tenpou said, trying to keep his voice from betraying the fear and anger he felt growing inside.

As he stood slowly, he pulled Kenren's arm around his shoulder, supporting most of his weight. Turning he started towards the stairs and stopped.

"You going to make it Ken-chan?"

"Yeah.." he groaned. "I'll make it. And don't call me Ken-chan."

The two friends looked at each other a moment as a faint smile passed across both their faces. Then they turned, focusing on the task in front of them- making it up the long and now intimidating stairs. Tenpou took a breath, shifted Kenren's weight slightly then moved to take the first step up, but was stopped suddenly.

There, standing in front of them, was Ro. Tenpou stared at him and Ro stared back, both just as surprised to see the other. Tenpou felt the anger starting to rise inside him. Ro… he had known where Kenren was… he was the one who had done this. He glared at the man in front of him, his eyes boring holes deep into him. 

" Tenpou…" Ro started as he stepped down.

Tenpou didn't answer; he just continued to glare at Ro, the look making them man lower his eyes, unable to meet those blazing eyes anymore. Without a word Tenpou turned and slowly started to climb the stairs, Kenren barely conscious enough to keep his feet moving as they finally made it to the top of the stairs.


	10. Chapter 10

You know the drill- you know who Sanzo and the others belong to and who Kai and the rest belong to

It took all the strength Tenpou had to climb those stairs, which seemed so much longer now than when he had first gone down them. AS he stepped up onto the last step, he heard Kenren groans slightly. 

"Finally…" he sighed as his eyes closed and Tenpou felt Kenren go limp as he shifted his weight and continued on.

Down the hallway they went, slowly, Tenpou pretty much carrying the unconscious Kenren as they went. Strangely, there was not a single person to be seen as they made their way back to Tenpou's place.

Once there, Tenpou stumbled over to the bed with Kenren and laid him, gently as he could, on the bed. Standing up with a sigh he closed his eyes and sighed- he could still see Ro's face clearly, that grin that had been on his face as he descended the stairs right up to the moment their eyes had met. No, it was no coincidence that had brought Ro to the dungeons this day. It was he what was behind this. 

Shaking his head to drive away the thoughts, Tenpou tuned to the bed and began tending to Kenren. It was then that he noticed his own shirt was stained red with Kenren's blood. As he started cleaning and dressing the wounds, he found that the worst were on his back, which would make it even harder on Kenren. He was busy cleaning and dressing the worse of the wounds, as Kenren lay on his stomach on the bed, groaning in pain as he drifted in and out of conciousness.

"Kenren," Tenpou asked softly at one point, "how long did Ro have you down there?"

"It… it was about… five or six days… I think." Kenren groaned as another wave of pain washed over him. "I'm not exactly sure… time… time had no meaning in that place…" 

Tenpou felt the already burning anger grow event hotter inside him. Six days? Ro had not meant to merely punish Kenren for some hot-headed comment or remark; he had intended to truly make him suffer. Ro obviously knew the law, making it forbidden to take a life, so he had not planned to kill Kenren, but judging by the condition Kenren was in, he had come very close to doing just that.

Kenren slipped back into the blackness of unconsciousness as Tenpou finished cleaning and dressing his wounds. Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. Tenpou ignored it. Again, there person knocked, a little louder this time. 

"Go away," Tenpou said bitterly, not moving form where he was kneeling beside the bed.

Once more the knock sounded. When Tenpou did not respond, he heard the soft click as the knob was turned and the door slowly creaked open slightly. He heard soft footsteps approach him as he stood, turning fast on the intruder.

"What!? I thought I told you to…"

He stopped short as he stared in shocked surprise. There, standing before him, was a young girl. She couldn't have been more than sixteen to look at her. She had long brown hair which was pulled back in a white ribbon. Here eyes were a deep emerald green and shone brightly with a fire's glow. She stood there in a simple white dress, a small satchel clutched to her chest. She jumped slightly at Tenpou's outburst but looked him in the eyes as she spoke.

"I'm sorry to intrude, Gensui-sama. My name is Kai. I… I came to offer you my services, such as they are. I have some skills in healing, and want to offer my services to you."

Tenpou remember her now. She was the young attendant to Prince Nataku, which meant she was also a servant of Li-Touten himself.

"Kai, I'm sorry I yelled," Tenpou sarted slowly.

"it's alright. I understand… you are worried about your friend, as am I. That is why I want to help you."

Tenpou nodded and watched as she walked over and knelt down beside the bed and began searching through her small pack. He stood behind her and watched as she checked the severity of Kenren's injuries.

"He's lost a lot of blood," she said as her face fell somewhat. "He has a strong spirit for sure, for I feel that it is all that is keeping him alive."

"Is he going to be alright?"

Kai didn't answer but set right to work, taking things out the pack and mixing different saves and herbs together.

"Kai… you live with Li-Touten do you not?"

"I do," she said simply, without looking up at him.

"And you were the maidservant to Prince Nataku correct?"

Kai nodded in response.

"Then why are you helping us? If Li-Touten or any of his men find you here…"

"I will be punished, I know. I may even be charged with treason and banished from The Heavens. But I do not care… I have been a servant to Li-Touten for as long as I can remember, and all I have seen from that man is cruelty, hate, and selfish ambition. Even for his own son he had no love or compassion. I am bound to serve his family, yet Nataku alone is the one I cared for. I was his one true companion and friend in this palace… the years before Douji-sama brought Goku to this place, I alone was the one Nataku confided in, the only one he would allow to see his tears. No, even after the arrival of Goku, he still confided the deepest secrets and dreams of his heart to me. But now… now he…" 

Kai's voice caught in her throat as a sob chocked her as she thought about Nataku, sitting there these many years, in his throne, unmoving, dead yet somehow still alive. Tenpou gently put a hand on her shoulder as she looked up at him.

"Nataku told me that he dreamt of the day when there would be peace- in the heavens and the world below, a day when everyone knew the treasure of friendship and strived to make the world a better place- for everyone. I know you and your friends also hold the same dreams and beliefs… That is why, why I want to help you."

Tenpou smiled slightly as he knelt down beside her and put his hand on hers.

"We would be honored to have you with us, Kai."

She smiled as she brushed away the stray tear off her cheek. She nodded and turned back to Kenren, who hadn't moved or made a sound the entire time. After cleaning the wounds she sighed and sat back a moment.

"His wounds are bad… it's a miracle he's still alive with the amount of blood he must have lost" she said softly. 

"Is there nothing else that can be done for him?"

"There is one more thing I can do to help Kenren… it's not much, but at this point every little bit we need."

Tenpou watched as Kai moved back to the edge of the bed. She stretched her hands out over Kenren's back, one hand spread out over his shoulders the other over his back. She closed her eyes, her brow tight with concentration as a soft white light grew around her hands. Tenpou stared in surprise as the light continued to grow brighter. After a few minutes Kai lowered her hands and Tenpou gasped slightly at what he saw- some of the wounds on Kenren's back were gone completely.

"I can only mend the minor ones, but its that much less his body has to heal on it own," Kai muttered softly as she stared down at Kenren.

"Kai.. how… how did you…" 

"That's the one skill I have- healing powers. I am still young and weak in a way myself so I cannot do much without putting my own life in danger, but I can do some. Who do you think it was who tended to Prince Nataku each time he returned from battle in the lower world? Time and time again he sustained injuries that would have killed even the strongest war general or field marshal, yet time and time again he recovered. When he… he got the way he is now because of Li-Touten, his own father… I tried to save him. I tried my best to save him, I almost died myself, but I couldn't do anything. Now, I serve a man I have no loyalty to, mourning the friend and master who is dead and yet alive, all the while dreaming of the day we may truly know peace. For whatever reason I have been given this skill, and I chose to use it to help those who stand for something." 

Tenpou nodded and put his arm around her gently. Neither of them said a word for a minute until the silence was broken by a soft moan from Kenren who opened his eyes. Turning his head slightly he looked over at them. 

"How do you feel, Kenren?" Tenpou asked.

"Like shit.." he groaned as he tried to move.

"Lie still Taishou-sama," Kai said gently with a soft smile.

"Taishou-sama?" Kenren asked with a soft laugh. "Call me Kenren."

"Very well then, Kenren, all I want you to do is rest for now."

Kenren obeyed and laid back down, his eyes sliding shut as he drifted back into the deep sleep. Kai and Tenpou stayed there watching over him.

The days passed slowly, until a week had gone by since that faithful day when Tenpou had found Kenren in the dungeons. Word had gotten around and by this time just about everyone in The Heavens knew what had happened… yet no one had seen any signs of Ro.

There was a knock on the door and Tenpou turned as the door opened. Jiroushin, The Merciful Goddess' aid, stood there in the door. He nodded to them and smiled slightly. 

"Good to see you are on the mend Kenren Taishou."

"Good to be feeling alive again Jiroushin, believe me."

Kenren had finally started making good progress. He could sit up in the bed on his own and was finally able to eat pretty much whatever he wanted. His strength was coming back, along with his typical sarcastic and fun loving attitude. He was still begging Kai for some rice wine, but she wouldn't allow it yet.

"So what brings you here. As much as I would like to think it, I doubt you came here just to pay me a visit," Kenren said with a laugh.

"Yes, there is another matter I came to speak with you about," Jiroushin said as he sat down in one of the chairs. "We have found Ro."

"Finally? Where was he hiding out?" Tenpou asked as he too sat down.

"We found him hiding in the South End Region… guess he had been there since the day you found Kenren… no one has seen him around here since that day. It was of course just a matter of time before we found him."

"So what is his punishment going to be?" Kenren asked as he pushed himself up a little more and leaned back against the pillow.

"well, I think a good part of that decision rests with you Kenren… you were the one the crime was committed against." Jiroushin said.

"I agree, " Tenpou said. 

"I would say banishment, but that seems like too easy of a way out for him…" Kenren mused out loud.

"Maybe there is something else…" Tenpou said simply.

The three talked for a long while back and forth until Kai came in to shoo them out.

"Alright enough talking and scheming for today. Kenren is still recovering and he needs his rest. Go on now… shoo!" 

Jiroushin and Tenpou laughed and stood from their seats. After a few more minutes of talk they left, leaving Kai to tend to Kenren. 

"He seems to be recovering rather well," Jiroushin said as they made their way to the Great Hall to meet with the Merciful Goddess.

"Yes, he is doing remarkably well, thanks to Kai and her skills. He still has a ways to go, but he if out of the woods and out of danger now- which is a relief to us all."

A few minutes later found them in the Great Hall, bowing before the great throne, as they began to discuss their plans about what to do with Ro. For long hours they talked and debated and discussed. When they finally ended, the dim light of The Heaven's night filled the sky as they felt their separate ways. As Tenpou enter his place once more, Kai was just getting ready to leave for the evening. 

"I will be back in a few days. I cannot spend as much time here, Li-Touten is growing suspicious of where I have been. Anyways, Kenren is on the med so I am not needed as much anyways," she said with a sad smile.

"Kai… had it not been for your help, I wouldn't be here," Kenren said softly as he fought to keep his eyes open, fighting off the sleep that was laying hold of him.

"It is true Kai, we are in your debt. Do what you need to do, take care of yourself. Thank you for everything you have done."

Kai smiled at them and Tenpou hugged her gently then she hurried off down the hall, fading into the darkness as she made her way back to Li-Touten.

Tenpou sat down in the chair by the bed as Kenren swore under his breath.

"Damnit… I hate the thought of that sweet young girl having to live under Li-Touten's shadow like she does."

"I agree… it is unfortunate for her, but maybe soon things will be different," Tenpou said simply. "Rest Kenren… tomorrow they are bringing Ro from the South End for his trial… and I want you there if at all possible."

"I wouldn't miss it…" Kenren muttered as he drifted to sleep.

Tenpou stood and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him quietly as he went and slept on the day couch in the other room. It seemed that no sooner had he laid down and closed his eyes that he was opening them again to find morning was upon them. 

There was already a large crowd gathered in the Great Hall when they arrived. Stopping outside the great golden doors, Kenren stopped, taking his arm from around Tenpou's neck.

"I'll go in on my own strength. I won't let him see what he's done to me."

Tenpou started to protest but he saw that look in Kenren's eyes and he knew how proud the war general could be so he said nothing and opened the door. All heads turned and all eyes were fixed on Kenren as he walked in, slowly, still limping slightly. He walked in, of his own strength and took his seat at the front before The Merciful Goddess. Tenpou followed and took his seat beside Kenren. Ro was already there, heavy manacles on his wrists and ankles. Once everyone was gathered the trial began, drawing on and on… Tenpou began to grow worried that Kenren's strength would wear out before it was over. Finally The Merciful Goddess stood and faced Ro.

"Ro Kinsha, you are here on charges of betrayal and disregard to the laws of The Heavens. You are charged with unjust imprisonment of an officer of Heaven, attempted murder of an officer of Heaven, disregard of the laws, and also of trying to flee. The evidence brought before you is unquestionable, and your own confession has sealed your fate. There are two punishments that await you Ro Kinsha. One is to be banished from The Heaven,s never to return, to live life on the lower world among the mortals and the youkai of the earth. The other would allow you to remain here in The Heavens, but you are to be stripped of all authority, power, and rank; you shall be no more than an aid to the War General Kenren Taishou."

Ro stared up in horror at what he was hearing. He dropped to his knees before the throne.

"Please, Merciful Goddess… I would take banishment. Please, be merciful, end my suffering and my humiliation and banish me now!"

The Merciful Goddess smiled softly and turned to face Kenren and Tenpou. The two of them stood to their feet, Tenpou putting his hand on Kenren's back slightly to steady him, as his strength was almost gone. 

"Ro Kinsha, you are here by given into the servant-ship of Kenren Taishou, until such a time that he deems otherwise."

Ro gasped in shock as he slumped forward, his hands on the floor as his head hung down.

"General Kenren, he is yours…. What do you want done with him now?"

Kenren looked at Ro a moment then took a breath.

"Imprison him until I can deal with him myself…" he said simply as he stood there, leaning against Tenpou slightly.

Ro let out a cry as two of the guards grabbed him by the shoulders. He fought so that they had to drag him out of the Great Hall, all while he was yelling and begging Kenren to reconsider. When the doors closed and everyone stared to leave, Kenren sank into the chair.

"It's done…." he muttered. "It's done…"


	11. Chapter 11

It was a long and slow recovery for Kenren. Shortly after Ro's sentencing, just when he was starting to make an improvement, an infection set in. His body was wracked with pain and his sleep was plagued with feverish nightmares and visions. Tenpou and Kai took shifts, watching him around the clock. When he slept, Kenren often muttered and cried out in his sleep, the names Hakkai, and Sanzo being two of the more prevalent names he would call out. On one particular evening, Kai was coming in to relive Tenpou.

"How is he doing?" she asked softly as she sat down on the small wooden stool beside the bed.

"Sleeping… finally. He's still fighting the fever," he said simply as he changed the cloth on Kenren's forehead for a cooler one. "I… I don't know how much longer he can keep fighting. I don't know if…."

"General Kenren is a strong one," she said honestly. "He is a fighter; he will be fine, Tenpou." 

Tenpou nodded silently, sitting there, making no motion to leave, even though Kai was there to relieve him. She looked down at Kenren then back to Tenpou. 

"He means a lot to you doesn't he?" she asked with a gentle smile. 

"He does. We have been friends for many years," Tenpou said with a sigh as he looked down at his friend. "We have been through our share of good times and bad. It always seems to be Kenren getting into trouble, and I always seem to be the one getting him out of it." A slight smile pulled at the corners of his mouth. "And it is the same… even now." 

"Your friendship is a strong one." 

"Yes… yes it is. It is a friendship few can understand fully; it is a friendship that many miss-read as something it is not." 

Kai nodded slowly. She had heard the rumors plenty of times before and knew how people talked about General Kenren and Field Marshall Tenpou. 

"The rumors that you are General Kenren's bead-warmer," Kai said simply- it was a well known fact that there were those in heaven, even in the highest ranks, who thought that the General and Field Marshall had more than a simple friendship going on. 

"Yes. That among others. It is almost as if they are desperate for it to be that ways and will grasp at any faint hint of it, despite anything said or shown to the contrary." 

"Few can understand a friendship like the one the two of you share- they will always down play it as something less, simply because they do not understand it and never will be able to understand that kind of friendship and love." 

"You are wise beyond your years Kai-chan." 

Kai smiled and reached into her bag for something, turning away briefly to hide her flushed cheeks. 

"Yes…. He is a good friend," Tenpou said softly, half to himself. "He is there to talk sense into me and dig me out of my books – and I have been there to get him out of trouble and back him up on his pranks." Tenpou laughed softly as Kai smiled. 

"Those were good times weren't they Tenpou?" 

Tenpou turned and stared in shock. Kenren slowly opened his eyes and looked up at him, a smile on his face. 

"Kenren!" 

"Heh… You that surprised to see me awake?" 

"How… how long have you been awake? 

"Ever since Kai came in." 

"Kenren! Why I otta…"

"Now, now… He still needs his rest," Kai said with a giggle. 

"So… you heard all of that then?"

"Yep, every word," Kenren said with that grin on his face. "But Tenpou? I… I am sorry." 

"For what?"

"For the troubles I have put you through. You once came to me apologizing for the way our friendship colored my name in the army. Well, now I… I apologize for the same thing."

"Kenren," Tenpou said with a soft smile. " Kenren, my friend. Do you not remember what it was you told me that day? Rumors are rumors and they are going to happen no matter what we do. As long as we do not live our lives by their scripts, the rumors will exists. I would rather have a friendship like ours and deal with the ridiculous rumors than live my life by their script. I have no regrets about our friendship Kenren, none." 

Kenren smiled slightly and Tenpou smiled back. They were silent a moment until Kai spoke up.

"Ok it is time for sleep. Kenren, you still need to rest, as do you Tenpou. I can not take care of both of you if you over do yourselves," she laughed as she shooed Tenpou out and tended to Kenren as he drifted back to sleep.

Meanwhile, Ro was becoming very familiar with the dungeons, but this time, from the point of view of a captive rather than the captor. This time it was he who was chained to the wall, a shackle around his ankles. It was he who knew the pains of hunger and thirst. It was he who now had to answer to Kenren. Despite all Ro had done to him, Kenren was more than gracious to him after his sentencing. Ro received one mean a day, had some freedom to move around in his cell, and he had not felt the pain of the lash once. This was more than what Kenren had experienced- he has been starved, chained to the wall by his arms, and had been beaten repeatedly. The only real pain Ro was experiencing was the humiliation and shame of being subjected to Kenren's command and being in the position of a servant.

One day, Kenren was making his way down the hall slowly with Tenpou beside him. He had fought and argued with Kai as only Kenren could, with his hard headedness, and finally she gave in an let him leave the wing of the palace where he had been the last two weeks. He had been making good progress. His strength was returning even though his whit and tongue had regained their speed long before. Kenren made his way down the hall, resting his hand on Tenpou's shoulder now and then- but only when none were around to see them. Some stopped to talk to them for a few moments along the way, including Goujun, Kenren's head general.

"Good to see you up and around again general," he said as Kenren and Tenpou stopped for a few minutes.

"Good to be back up and around," Kenren responded with a slight nod to Goujun. For now at least he would play the part of a submissive underling; he was in no mood or condition for the battle of whit and will he and his commanding general were so fond of. 

"I never would have pegged Ro to do something so drastic. I know he is as hot headed as you are Kenren, but still, this is beyond him!" 

"We feel the same," Tenpou said simply. "It was just as big a surprise to us." 

"You can say that again," Kenren remarked with a slight laugh. "I will be recovering from this for some time to come. That Ro sure hates to loose and he hates even more to be proven wrong."

"Well, Ro has quite the punishment in store for him when you get there I am sure, Goujun said, knowing exactly where they were heading. 

"He does indeed… but not from the lash or anything we do, but rather from his own mind." 

"Tenpou is right. The torture and agony Ro is putting himself through is probably worse than anything we could ever bring ourselves to do to him."

After a few more brief moments, Kenren and Tenpou turned and went on their way, leaving Goujun there to tend to the reserves.

As they entered the dungeon, Kenren stopped and leaned against the cool stone wall for a minute. The last thing he wanted was for Ro to see him still weak and pitiful. Kenren descended the last of the stairs and entered the small corridor with Tenpou close behind him, watching him closely. They passed the two guards who stood at either side of the entrance, motionless and silent. They saluted Kenren and Tenpou as they passed, showing them the respect they deserved as War General and Field Marshal. Kenren kept his eyes straight ahead as he passed by, the expression on his face unchanging- he was General of Heaven's Western Army after all, he had to act like it. Tenpou nodded to the guards as he passed and they returned to their former position at the door. 

They walked up to the gated door and stopped, hearing a bone chilling laugh coming from inside. Ro sat there, back to the wall where he had been sitting, of his own free will, for the past three days. The plate of food sat untouched beside him other than the few chew marks the rats had left. Ro laughed as he lifted his head and looked at them. It was an unnerving laugh- the kind of laugh a man makes when he is caught against the wall and is trying to frighten his enemies and pump himself up at the same time. That is the kind of laugh that came from Ro's throat. Kenren stood at the bars, hands at his sides, his face showing no emotion whatsoever. Ro looked up at him and sneered. 

"Finally come to pay an old friend a visit?"

"An old friend who seems hell bent on being my enemy."

"oh harsh words coming from you Kenren."

"Harsh maybe, but not totally undeserved."

Ro hung his head slightly and laughed.

"Why does it have to be like this Kenren? Why do we always have to be on opposite sides of the field? Can we not, for once, agree and unite our minds and our abilities?" 

"If you have something you want to say then say it," Tenpou spat, quickly losing his patience with the man in front of him.

"Surly you have seen it Kenren," he continued, totally ignoring Tenpou. "You have seen the corruption in the Army of Heaven, even in the ranks higher than you. The corruption has only spread in the time that you have been away, spread even to General Goujun. It has even reached to those outside the army like Li-Touten and maybe even as high as the Merciful Goddess herself."

"Why you little…" Kenren started but Ro kept right on talking.

"We have to untie! We have to unite Kenren and reveal the corruption that has taken hold of this once fair place. If we do nothing but sit by and watch it happen, this place will be no different than the lower world by the end of it all. We must do this and now!" 

"Unite to uncover the corruption in heaven?" exclaimed Tenpou. "You are talking about reason- of the highest sort Ro! You are talking betrayal of everything that we hold dear!" 

"Tenpou is right, Ro," Kenren said calmly, though his voice betrayed the hints of aggravation. It is like I told you before. I… we, hold to the things that truly matter- friends, family justice, peace, and the hops that through a few good people, change can come and come for the better. You will get the same answer from us now as you did then- no. I will not betray the thing that mean the most to me, for the sake of helping some self absorbed jerk better himself at the expense of others. If there is corruption in Heaven, your way is the way of corruption Ro, and I will have nothing to do with it!" 

"You go too far Kenren!" Ro exclaimed as he jumped to his feet, the chain around his ankle clanging loudly as he did so.

"Come on Kenren, it is useless… if he wants to starve to death and rot away down here that is his choice. You have done all that you can do."

"Yes Kenren, listen to your sweet little Tenpou. You are a pathetic excuse for a war general. Kenren Taishou! If it wasn't for your little Tenpou, you would have been banished long ago, with no hope of ever returning! You really are not so tough without your little pal there to back you up are you? You act tough only because he is there and there are these bars between us- take them away and you are nothing more than a pathetic weakling!"

"You bastard!" Kenren shouted as he reached through the bars, his hands closing around Ro's throat.

"Hah… see? Only with the bars here between us can you be this tough. Only when he, is here" Ro said as his eyes shifted over Kenren's shoulder, looking into Tenpou's glinting eyes.

"Kenren… don't do it…" Tenpou whispered. 

"Shut up Tenpou," Kenren said softly yet firmly.

"Why don't you listen to him Kenren?" Ro gasped through Kenren's hold on him. "You do everything else he tells you to do. The Field Marshal who puts himself under a General. Tell me Tenpou, how does it feel? How does it feel… to be the bed-warmer pf the great general Taishou?" Ro started to laugh that maniacal laugh once more as Kenren tightened his grip. 

"You son of a bitch!"

The two stood there, Kenren's hands tightening all the more around Ro's neck, his arms on Kenren's hands, both oblivious to anything Tenpou was saying. 

"Go ahead… kill me. You know you want to, you know you can, Kenren…" Ro gasped as his body started to go limp.

"No," Kenren said simply as he let go, letting Ro's body sink to the floor. "I am not like you Ro. I will not stoop to your level." 

Kenren turned and looked back at Tenpou, who was staring at him in shock.  
"It's alright Tenpou," he said, gasping slightly. "Let's go."

The two turned and made their way towards the stairs, Ro laying on the cell floor, gasping for breath. As they stared to climb the stair Ro pushed himself up and staggered back to his feet and called to them through the bars.

"This isn't over yet Kenren! You think you have beaten me? This is not over yet! Heaven will fall either by its own hand or by another's- decide carefully which side you will be on. It could mean the difference between life and death for you and your little friend there." 

"Shut up Ro," Kenren muttered as he climbed the stairs with Tenpou.

All the way up the stairs Kenren walked of his own strength, but once they reached the top and stood in the long hallway, he stopped.

"Kenren?" Tenpou asked, looking at his friend with concern on his face.

"Tenpou… my head… hurts…" he muttered as he put a hand on Tenpou's shoulder and felt himself pitch forward and black out momentarily.

He felt Tenpou catch him as he opened his eyes. He felt himself being held up by Tenpou's strong arms as they continued down the hall.

"Kai is not going to be too happy…" Kenren said with a weak laugh. "She told me to take it easy." 

"She is going to kill me for letting you get like this," Tenpou said with a mock scolding tone as a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. 

The two friends laughed and continued down the hall to Kenren's rooms, where Kai was waiting for them, hands on her hips and not looking too happy at all.


	12. Chapter 12

It had been almost four days since they had buried Hakkai along side the still semi-new grave of Gojyo, and Sanzo was not doing well at all. For the past three days, he had sat in the window, unmoving. He sat there, still and silent, in the same room where Gojyo had taken his last breath, the same room where he had been forced to kill Hakkai. Since that evening, when he and Goku had stood by the freshly dug grave, Sanzo had not spoken, eaten, or even looked at Goku, no matter what he said or did. 

On this, the evening of the third day, Goku slowly pushed open the door to the small room which had become like a prison to Sanzo. A shudder ran through him as he stepped into the room- he could still see Gojyo laying on the bed pale and thin and he could see Hakkai on the floor still and lifeless. He walked over to Sanzo, a small tray of food in his hands. Goku was by no means as good a cook as Hakkai had been- he really missed the special dishes Hakkai use to make for him. He wasn't as good at shopping as Gojyo was but he still knew enough to know what would make a decent meal. Day after day he had brought in a tray of food to Sanzo and day after day he was ignored. This wasn't the first time the violet-eyed priest had fallen into one of his deep depressions, but he had never been like this before. Usually, he would eventually respond to the monkey's prodding and either be snappy back at him or push him away, but now, he made no response at all. Goku set the tray down on the small table set between the window and the bed. A pile of burned cigarettes butts littered the floor and the room was filled with a slightly smoky haze. Several empty and crushed beer cans also lay scattered on the floor around his feet. Three unopened ones remained on the window sill near Sanzo.

"Sanzo? I brought you some dinner…" Goku said softly, looking, waiting for some sort of response but getting none. "Come on Sanzo… talk to me."

Sanzo turned from the window slowly and looked at Goku with empty hollow eyes. His face was drawn and thin, his eyes cold and empty, and his body worn and thin. Yet, the physical pain was nothing compared to what his emotions were doing to him. For all the years he had known Cho Hakkai, he knew that the chance always remained that one day the Youkai powers would take control and overpower him. Several times the two of them had talked about what would be done if that should ever come to pass. Every time, Sanzo's response was the same to Hakkai's question. 'I will do what need to be done should it ever come to that." He knew what he had to do and it was nothing he didn't know about, but nothing could have prepared him for that moment. To stand there and know in his heart that he had to kill his friend was the hardest thing he had ever had to do. Sanzo was not as cold and heartless as he always seemed – it was a front- his defense against getting hurt too deeply yet again. He cared about his companions very much and had shed many tears already for Gojyo and now for Hakkai. 

Goku looked away from Sanzo, he couldn't bear to look into those sad droopy eyes. His eyes fell on one of the unopened cans of beer nearby. Slowly he grabbed the can and held it out to Sanzo, his head handing down slightly. For a while neither of them moved and is seemed Sanzo was ignoring him again. Then, slowly Sanzo reached out and took the can, Goku still standing there, head down, as Sanzo reached a hand out, put it on his head and pushed his head back slightly looking into those big golden eyes.

"Stupid monkey," he muttered as Goku looked up at him.

"S…Sanzo…" he said as he smiled through the tears.

Goku sat down in the chair near the window, both of them sitting in silence- Sanzo staring out the window, Goku staring up at Sanzo. Finally the silence was broken as Sanzo sighed. 

"So, what's for dinner?" 

Goku looked up at him and smiled brightly. 

"Meat buns! I made them myself!" he said proudly. 

"I swear, is that all you know how to make?"

"I can't help it… and what's so bad about meat buns? I think they are just delicious!" 

"Tsssk… you think everything is good when you are hungry and you are always hungry," Sanzo said as he cracked opened the can of beer Goku had handed him. 

The next hour passed with some conversation and ended with two empty plates, three empty cans of beer, a few more cigarette butts on the floor, and Goku asleep as he leaned against Sanzo. Sanzo sat there in the window, Goku's head resting on his knee. 

"Stupid monkey' he muttered in an almost concerned tone.

Standing, Sanzo picked Goku up and carried him into the other room and alid him on the bed. He stood there as his mind flashed back to something Goku had asked him just a little while before he fell asleep.

'Sanzo, what's going to happen to us now?' is what he had asked him. Sanzo sighed softly as he looked down at the sleeping Goku.

"I wish I could tell you Goku. I do not know what is going to happen to us now" he said softly as he turned and left, going outside for the first time in four days. He wandered, not really noticing or caring where he was going. When his feet finally stopped, and his mind cleared of the pain and darkness for a moment, he found himself standing in front of Gojyo and Hakkai's graves. A smaller mound was there next to Hakkai's headstone, the final resting place of his faithful companion Hakuyru. Since the day they had buried Hakkai, the small white dragon had not left that spot. He wouldn't eat and didn't last long after the second day. No amount of coxing would draw him from that spot as he lay there next to the cold stone, chirping sorrowfully. Even when Goku tried to carry him back to the inn he fought and scratched until Goku let him go. Now even Hakuyru was gone, more than half of the Ikkou was gone. 

"I really don't know what is going to happen to us now…" Sanzo muttered as he stared at the graves before him.

"It is hard is it not, having to see your friends and companions suffer and die?"

Sanzo turned around towards the stranger's voice behind him. Before him stood a man, dressed in a cream shirt and black pants, a cloak drawn about his shoulders against the cool of the night. Sanzo had shed his monks robe a few hours earlier and was only in his pants and black undershirt, yet he felt nothing of the night's chill. He stood there facing this stranger as the pale moonlight filtered down.

"Who are you?" he asked, mentally kicking himself for leaving his gun on the window ledge.

"I am called Yuuru. You need not worry Konzen, I am a friend."

"Konzen? Who are you talking to? I don't know any Konzen, old man." 

"Has it really been so long… have you really lost all memories of who you once were?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You were once Konzen Guensin, nephew of the Merciful Goddess herself. You were one of the high ranking gods of heaven, you served in the offer under the Merciful Goddess and had many under your control. You also had friends there- General Kenren and Field Marshal Tenpou. "

Sanzo's eyes grew wide as he listened and slowly started to remember.

"That was your old life Konzen. Now you are here… having to watch your friends die. It is always hard to see but even more so for the leader of the group, because ultimately you blame yourself." 

"Thank you. Your compassion is just overwhelming," Sanzo said sarcastically as he turned and started to walk away.

"I can give it all back to you. Your old friends, your old memories, your old life."  
Sanzo stopped though he did not turn around as he spoke. 

"You… you can?"

"I can. You could be happy once again. You do not have to keep suffering, you can get your old life back Konzen."

"And why would you do something like that for me?" 

"Because, ones as strong as you and your friends are needed in the heavens. You helped to maintain the balance and order and now that balance as been disrupted and all is in chaos. We need ones like you in charge once more. Also, I know how much you have suffered in this life; I want to help you escape it." 

"Your offer sounds all well and good," Sanzo said as he turned and started into Yuuru's eyes. "However, I must decline your offer." 

"You refuse my offer? Why Konzen?"

"Because I cannot run away from my problems so much that I do not look after the one who needs me the most. Goku is alone in this world if I am gone; I cannot abandon him, no matter how tempted I may be to do so. Also, I am not Konzen Geuinsu anymore- I am Genjyo Sanzo- for however long I am alive in this life, and I intend to live in this life, not the memory of some past life." 

"Bravo! Well spoken my friend. Very admirable of you to give so much for the sake of your friends. I cannot force you to accept my offer and I do not wish to do so. Indeed, that would defeat the entire point. No, you are free to make your own choice. I shall see you again. You are free to change your mind at any time, the offer still remains. Farewell Konzen."

Yuuru bowed slightly as Sanzo turned and started to walk away.

"It's Sanzo," He said as he walked away, leaving Yuuru standing there beside the two graves.

When Sanzo had faded from sight, Yuuru looked up into the night sky, to the bright stars that shimmered in the clear sky. As he looked up at the countless stars he sighed.

"Hang in there boys… you know how stubborn he can be. Be patient… keep doing what you are doing and he will be joining you soon enough."

Turning, Yuuru walked into the woods nearby, melting into the blackness and vanishing without a trace as the cool night breeze blew and Sanzo made his way back to find Goku still fast asleep.

The following day they packed up and left, leaving behind them the not just memories but their two companions as well. For the next few days they traveled, on foot, always heading West, even though they really did not know if there was any reason to be continuing their quest at this point. Goku dealt with the pain and hurt by talking, Sanzo dealt with it by keeping everything shut inside. Goku talked about the times shared with Gojyo and Hakkai, and Sanzo tried to forget every memory of them. This was how they traveled, walking by day until the light was gone from the sky, and sleeping until the sun broke over the horizon. On this night, Sanzo was having an especially hard time. He looked over at the sleeping Goku as he put his head in his hands, the maddening rush of emotions driving him insane. Everywhere he looked, he saw memories of Gojyo and Hakkai- even looking at himself or Goku brought them back. Yet, when he closed his eyes he once again saw them- Gojyo laying on the bed as he drew his last breath and the look on Hakkai's face in that final moment when he had pulled the trigger. It was too much for him to take.

Standing to his feet Sanzo slowly walked away from the small camp, leaving Goku sleeping, propped against the old log by the small fire. He stopped a little ways away in a small clearing and pulled out the silver pistol, leveling it at his head. Fighting to control his breathing he squeezed the trigger, nothing but the sound of air popping through the barrel. Sanzo cursed under his breath and squeezed it again, nothing. For once, the pistol was unloaded. With hands trembling Sanzo loaded the gun and cocked it once more, and raised it up. A t that moment he heard something behind him.

"Sanzo? What do you think you are doing? 

Sanzo turned slowly to see Goku standing there at the edge of the clearing, a look of shock and horror on his face as he looked from Sanzo to the pistol held in his hand. 

"Leave me alone, stupid monkey.." Sanzo muttered

"What are you doing with the gun? Can't you sleep?"

"What does it look like I'm doing? now leave me alone!" Snazo snapped as Goku realized what was going on right before him. 

"Ok, you made your point. I'll stop talking about Gojyo and Hakkai...just put down the gun and get some sleep" Goku's heart was pounding so loud he was sure Sanzo could hear it. His mouth was dry with fear, the words barely making it past his tongue and his feet felt nailed to the floor. "Come on Sanzo, it's going to be morning soon and we still have a day or two until we get to the next town. We need to get some sleep- you know how crabby we both get when we don't get enough sleep."

"Morning..." Sanzo muttered and the gun dropped down slightly. "One more day I have to live with what it is I have done..." Slowly he lowered the gun but still held onto it as he looked over at Goku, tears that had been held back for so long starting to brim up in his eyes.

Goku's eyes widened with shock as he looked at Sanzo. Never in his life did he expect to see emotion like this from Sanzo. Memories flooded Goku's mind, the day Sanzo freed him from his cage, feeling happy for the first time in his life...feeling needed. But one memory began to overshadow all the good memories… his little bird. That was the first living thing he became attached to and his first lesson about death. Goku could still remember the pain and he didn't want to lose Sanzo. 

"Sanzo, you didn't do anything! How could you have stopped what happened to Gojyo and Hakkai? You couldn't have stopped it! They kept their feelings hidden away within them.. so afraid to let them show, that by the time anyone knew they were in pain, it was too late!" Goku slowly started walking towards Sanzo, desperately trying to keep himself together. 

Sanzo stood still, frozen, back to Goku, the pistol still in his hand down at his side. 'Kept their feeling so deep within them' how much that sounded like him... Sanzo thought back, when was the last time he had let his emotions show, or even when had he last let himself admit his own emotions? He had to confess he almost couldn't remember that time. 'Ever since the day I lost what was most precious to me... Master Koumyo... I have never wanted to know the pain of loss. You cannot feel pain at losing something you care nothing about, so I merely stopped caring...' Sanzo's voice echoed in his head. He was brought back to reality as he felt a light touch on his hand, his hand jerking away slightly and turning to see Goku standing there in front of him.

"How can you just stop caring?" Goku tilted his head, tears shining in his golden eyes. "I think you care more than you let on, you are just afraid to show it or you don't know how to show it but I know you care Sanzo! Sure, you don't show it like other people...ya know, those paper fans really hurt! You can sure hit hard!" Goku smiled but it quickly faded away as he looked up at the one who meant the world to him. "I didn't have anything before you came, I was alone and forgotten- I might as well have not even been alive. I was so alone and wanted someone to come. I didn't even know I was callin' ya; all I can remember feeling is loneliness and I wished for someone who would want to be with me and not leave me... someone who would like me for me. Someone I could call...brother" Goku looked down at the ground. His hands were clenched at his side and he was unashamed at the tears falling on the ground. With his head still lowered, tears dripping off his cheeks, Goku whispered softly. "Don't do anything rash, Sanzo. Stay with me." Goku fell to his knees. "Please."

Sanzo looked down at Goku, he had seen the little monkey teary eyed before but never like this. He had felt his heart get pricked slightly by the words that crazy kid could somehow manage to come up with, but never the way it was breaking his heart now. "Brother..." that word stuck in Sanzo's mind. Brother... brother. They all had been like a family- a dysfunctional one- but a family none the less, yet it was him who Goku called brother. As Goku sank to his knees, his fists tight around the loose folds of Sanzo's robe, Sanzo felt the first tear slide down his cheek. Un-cocking the gun, Sanzo left it slip form his hands as it landed on the soft mossy ground. Kneeling down himself, he gently reached his hand out and pushed Goku's head up and looked at him, his deep piercing violet eyes looking into those big golden ones. "Stupid monkey" he muttered, but his voice was soft and cracking slightly.

"Are you staying with me, Sanzo? You promise you won't leave me?" Goku could barely see Sanzo through the tears in his eyes. Goku waited for an answer from Sanzo. 

"I promise, Goku... I wont leave you of my own hand." Sanzo let out a slight gasp as he felt two arms tighten around him and he looked down to see Goku's face buried in his robes. "I promise" he said again as he put a hand on Goku's head. The two of them stayed that way, kneeling there in the clearing for some time, until Sanzo slowly, gently pushes Goku back and looked down at him. "I'd say we have about three hours left before sunrise... how about we get some sleep?'

"Ok!" Goku stood up and wiped his eyes. A soft grumble broke the mood. Goku hugged his belly. "I'm hungry, Sanzo! Can I eat now? Idon't think I'm going to make it to dawn!" 

A slight smile pulled at the corners of Sanzo's mouth. "Whatever.. go and eat if it will keep you quiet." Goku ran off towards the camp as Sanzo bent down and picked up the pistol and slipped back into the deep folds of his robe and walked back to the camp site, and laid down, his head propped against the log as Goku searched his pack for something to eat.

Sanzo could hear Goku talking to himself. He shook his head. Some things never changed. 

" Yeah! I got pocky, chips and noodles. Awww, I hate waiting five whole minutes for the ramen to be done! I'm hungry now!!" Goku's head emerged out of the pack, a stick of pocky poking out of the corner of his mouth as he held several packs of ramen and a bag of chips. 

"Sanzo, you want anything?" Goku yelled. He was about to yell again but watching Sanzo, he realized the monk had fallen asleep. Goku smiled softly, giggling to himself. "More for me."

Sanzo drifted to sleep to the sound of Goku's 'annoying' voice, yet tonight, it was what relaxed and calmed him. He slept an empty dreamless sleep for the first time in months. Goku stared into the fire as Sanzo slept, his thoughts all jumbled about in his mind. 

"I wish Hakkai was here. He's always so nice to me and I can talk to him about anything." Goku sighed, his chin resting in his left palm. "If that stupid Kappa was here..."Goku's voice trailed off. He couldn't believe how much it hurt thinking about that crazy Kappa! Goku shook his head. What was he thinking? Gojyo was a jerk! Always picking on him, making him get beer after beer and worse...eating the best food before he could get to it at meal time! Also, not to mention how uncomfortable it was to be around Gojyo while he was trying to pick up women! He always seemed to get kicked more for being in the way during those times. Goku's mind drifted to a conversation he and Gojyo had just a few months ago...

"God, you suck! Why do you insist on embarrassing yourself like this you idiot?" Goku shoved Gojyo's shoulder away from him. 

" Just you wait until you get older! Although, you will never understand women like I do." 

"What's to understand?" Goku shouted. "You ask them their name, they giggle and tell you, then you make some perverted remark about them and Sanzo yells at you and hits you with the fan." 

Gojyo smiled, "That, you little monkey, is called foreplay." Gojyo lit another cigarette and leaned back in his seat smiling as the drove on, following the setting sun. "Best part of chasing women if you ask me."

Goku stared at Gojyo for a little bit. "I don't get it" He shook his head. Gojyo smiled and turned to Goku, blowing smoke in his face.

"And that's why, stupid monkey, you never will."

Goku smiled at the memory. He still didn't get all of it but he did ask Hakkai a lot of questions about it after that. Goku was shocked to find out how babies were born and where they came from. It sounded kinda gross to him and didn't know why anyone would be obsessed about it the way Gojyo was, but he remembered the look of longing on Hakkai's face and he had the thought that maybe if you really loved someone, it wasn't so gross after all. He pictured Sanzo trying to woo a woman and he couldn't help but giggle some at the mental picture: Sanzo walking up to a woman, looking her over, and then grabbing her saying, "Let's go."

Hakkai had asked him if he ever had feelings for a girl. Goku told him that of course he did. Didn't he remember the girl they ran into a while back at that one village who hated youkai but cooked really well? Goku started drooling just thinking about her cooking.

"I really liked her, Hakkai. She was nice and she was a kick ass cook too!"

"Did you ever want to spend time with her, just her and you alone?" Hakkai asked. 

"Hell yeah!! Her cooking was the best!" Goku said with a broad smile.

Hakkai sighed, "You really are too young, aren't you, Goku?" Hakkai smiled and ruffled Goku's hair. "It's better that way trust me," he said with a slight laugh. Hakkai turned and began walking back to their hotel room, softly humming a little tune. "Well Hakuryu, at least we only have to worry about Gojyo around women for now. Maybe we have a few years before Goku starts breaking hearts wherever we go." Hakuryu cheeped happily, nuzzling Hakkai as Hakkai scratched his neck. 

Goku smiled at those memories. So, he still didn't get the woman thing and he would never understand why a woman would look twice at a perverted Kappa and go all weak at the knees. Or, why so many looked like they wanted to hug Hakkai until he smiled and laughed again. These were some of the good memories Goku had of his closest friends, but memories were never going to be enough again. He looked at Sanzo sleeping by the fire. 

"I've got to be strong. I have to be the man I'm meant to be. I know I'll probably get hit with that fricking fan again, but I have to tell Sanzo I think we should change our plans. We have already failed, even if we make it to Shangri-La there's nothing the two of us can do. Fuck Kou and his group! I don't care about the youkai, I could care less if Guymouh is revived! I want Hakkai back!" Tears started flowing again, dripping down on his hands. Goku put his head down on his knees and covered his head so there was no chance of anyone overhearing him. "I miss Gojyo...Damn I miss him!" With that thought, Goku could no longer hold back the sobs that tore from his throat as his body shuddered.


	13. Chapter 13

After the scare with Sanzo, Goku was on edge. He didn't sleep much at night, his stomach was in knots, and he was always watching over Sanzo as he slept. They talked though, and for that Goku was grateful. They talked about the past, the memories they had made of Gojyo and Hakkai, and they talked about the plans for the future. Sanzo had decided that they would continue on their path to the West, but not for the original reason. Now their goal was to find a new place to settle down- and finish living out their lives. They might have failed in the task they had originally set out to accomplish, but they weren't going to let that stop them from living the rest of their lives to the fullest. The pain and hurt was still there, Goku knew it would never fully go away, but being able to talk about it and remember was easier than pushing it into a corner and trying to forget about it.

One morning, as the sun began to rise over the horizon Goku woke up. Looking beside him he sat up fast, realizing Sanzo wasn't there. Looking around, heart racing, he let out a sigh and started to relax. Sanzo stood a little ways away from the camp, facing the rising sun, the bright sunrays turning him into a dark silhouette as he stood there. Goku sat there staring at him, there was this aura about Sanzo as he stood there, his golden hair shinning as bright as the newly risen sun. Goku smiled, everything would be alright, as long as he had Sanzo with him- he knew he would never be alone. 

The two friends made their way through the edge of the woods and stood there and smiled, for before them lay the town. They had finally made it.

"Man, I am sure looking forward to some good food!" Goku exclaimed as he rubbed his rumbling stomach. 

"I'm looking forward to a hot shower and a nice soft bed for once" Sanzo said with a smile.

"Well come on let's get going then!" 

Goku started running down the hill excitedly while Sanzo followed, walking calmly behind him, lighting another cigarette as he went. A short time later, they were walking up the wide dirt road that lead to the gates of the city. Goku ran on towards the gate as Sanzo yelled at him to wait up. Just then there was a terrific explosion at the gates, right in front of Goku. Jumping back in surprise with a yell, Goku fell onto his back as Sanzo ran over to him. Thick smoke hung in the air, mixed with dust from the road as bits and pieces of the city gate and wall rained down on them. 

"What the hell was that?" Goku exclaimed as he stared up at the broken and mangled gates. Sanzo stood beside him the pistol already drawn and ready. As the smoke started to clear they stared in surprise and shock. There before them, standing between them and the shattered gates was a youkai. He had pale, pale blue skin, fiery eyes, and wild pink hair that stood up in spikes on his head. Thick lab glasses sat on his nose and pointed ears, and different wires running from the different pockets on his shirt and pants. He stood there, in his hand a remote detonator the button pressed down, a wisp of smoke still rising from it. 

"Oh, that was such an unfortunate accident" the Youkai said with a wicked laugh. "But then again… accidents do happen." With that he tossed the detonator aside and sneered at Sanzo and Goku.

"Ensui… you bastard!" Sanzo spat as he raised the pistol.

"Ensui, you mean him? I thought he got rid of him for good last time!"

"Evidently you were not as through as you though," Ensui said with a laugh.

"A mistake we will not make again, rest assured" Sanzo said coldly.

"My, my you really need to watch that temper of yours Sanzo-sama… might get you hurt one day."

"You better not even think about hurting Sanzo!" Goku cried as his Noiy-bo stick appeared in his hand.

"As protective as ever I see. Tell me Sanzo why did you pick up a creature like him? 

"What I pick up and what I leave is not of your concern Ensui, but mine. Now, what business do you have here? I find it hard to believe you are just here to pay us a visit." 

"Still observant as ever I see. Yes there is a different reason for me being here- you two. I have come to end your travels West and lighten your responsibility of the Saten Scritpures."

"I would like to see you try," Sanzo muttered.

"Did Kougajii send you?" shouted Goku as he took a step towards Ensui.

"Kougajii? That incompetent fool? Hah, he has nothing to do with this. I am after the Scriptures for my own reason and I will do whatever it takes to get them."

"Come on then and give it your best shot!" Goku challenged as he lowered his staff, ready to attack. He felt a hand on his shoulder as Sanzo stood beside him.

"Oh I shall Son Goku, and the Scriptures will be mine!"

Ensui laid his head back as he laughed sadistically, his hand reaching into his shirt as he pulled out several small red balls. They looked like marbles, and were about the same size as well. Still laughing he tossed the small balls at Goku and Sanzo. Goku dove out of the way, Sanzo close behind but the monk wasn't fast enough. When the balls hit the hard pack clay of the road they exploded with a large force and a great deal of smoke and noise. Goku was thrown to the ground as Sanzo skidded across the road. Opening his eyes Goku looked around as the smoke began to lift. He saw Sanzo laying at the edge of the road unmoving, knocked out cold. Staggering to his feet and picking up his staff he looked around for Ensui, his eyes watering from the chemicals in the balls.

"That is just a taste of what I can do, Son Goku. Why don't you just give me the Scriptures now and the two of you can be on your way with no further fuss or harm."

"You obviously don't know us… we don't ever run away from a fight! Bring it on Ensui! I'm ready for you!"

"This will be fun!" he exclaimed as he threw several more marbles at Goku, each one exploding as the hit the ground, one after another.

The ground shook and the air was thick with dust and chemicals. Goku stood up yet again… how long would this keep up? He glanced over at Sanzo who was still knocked out.

"Damn" he muttered to himself. "Ensui that bastard…"

Ensui was now standing on top of the broken remains of the gate laughing down at Goku. Jumping down he walked towards Sanzo. Goku knelt there gasping for breath his eyes and lungs burning from the smoke. He had to stop Ensui but he was just too much for him… that was when Goku realized what he had to do. Swallowing hard he glanced over to Ensui as he bent down, his hand reaching out towards the Scriptures around Sanzo's shoulders. Taking a deep breath, Goku reached up and took off the golden diadem, letting it drop to the ground. For a moment there was nothing, then he felt it, that sudden rush of power, that fire that rushed through his veins and set his very mind and being on fire with a wild and raging furry.

His head bent back, hands clutching his head, Goku let out a bone chilling cry. Ensui turned around with a shock and stared. Blinking in disbelief he stared at the fellow youkai standing before him- The long wild brown hair, long pointed years, razor sharp fangs, curved claws on each finger, and big yellow eyes that looked like a crazed animal's. Ensui felt his blood run cold for a minute then he sneered. 

"I thought that diadem was more than just poor fashion taste… it was your power limiter. This is going to be quite the interesting battle. I wonder who will be the one who comes out victorious?" 

Goku said nothing, he just stood there- a wicked grin on his face and he licked his lips lightly. Goku was a true killing machine in his youkai form- never speaking or thinking, acting only on pure animalistic instincts. Turning with a snarl on his lips Goku charged towards Ensui in a blinding flash. 

Ensui grabbed a handful of what looked like pink dust from the bag tied to his belt. Just as Goku was in front of him, he threw it to the ground with a loud explosion, a cloud of thick pink smoke filling the air. Ensui stood there, breathing hard as the smoke slowly started to clear. Looking around, a smirk spread across his face- the little youkai was nowhere to be seen. Just then he heard something behind him and his face when white. Turning quickly he caught a flash of Goku's claw like fingers as his hand flew, striking him in the chest.

"No.. its not possible. He cant be that fast…" Ensui thought to himself in the instant it too for Goku's hands to make contact, sending him flying through the air, landing in the middle of the road with a hard thud.

Pushing himself up, his shirt torn and bloody, Ensui looked up and saw Sanzo laying there just a few feet away. Crawling over he reached out, his fingers touching the Scriptures as a hand grasped his wrist tightly. Looking down he looked into the deep eyes of Sanzo. 

"I don't think you want to do that Ensui" he said simply as he pulled the youkai's hand away slowly. 

Ensui stared down at him, then his eyes went wide and the color drained from his face. Goku stood behind him, his right hand buried deep in Ensui's back. With a wicked grin he lifted his leg and kicked the youkai hard, sending him sailing over Sanzo and onto the ground on his back. Goku jumped over Sanzo and landed lightly on top of Ensui as he lay there gasping for breath and stared up in horror. He stared to say something but was silenced as Goku drew back his hand, and took swipe after swipe at him. All the while he was laughing sadistically, that gleam in his eyes as he licked his lips hungrily.

During this rampage, Sanzo had staggered to his feet and was staring in horror at what he was seeing. Walking up behind him, he grabbed Goku's hand as he swung it. In a flash Goku spun around, his other hand striking Sanzo hard, sending him skidding across the ground. 

"Goku… stop this" he groaned as he rolled onto his stomach and pushed himself up. Staggering to his feet he looked at Goku who now stood beside the bloodied body of Ensui, who was struggling to draw each ragged breath. Behind the carnage lay the golden diadem, glittering in the light of the now setting sun. "Stupid monkey… why the hell did you take it off?" he asked as he turned and faced Goku fully. "You know what a pain it is to get that thing back on."

The two stood there facing each other, neither moving. A gentle breeze kicked up, blowing through Sanzo's short blond hair and sending Goku's wild hair blowing across his face. Sanzo took that split second to make a run for it, but Goku was just too fast. With speed that made him seem to almost vanish for a second, he was behind Sanzo, kicking him to the ground hard. Sanzo heard the sound of ribs cracking and felt the breath leave him as he hit the ground. Groaning and struggling for breath he tried to crawl to the diadem that lay only a few yards away. Goku jumped upon him, those long curved youkai claws gleaming for a split second before they swiped, ripping Sanzo's robe into bloody shreds. A cry escaped Sanzo's lips as the rolled over kicking Goku off hard as he could. In the few seconds he had Sanzo reached out and grabbed the diadem and rolled onto his back just as Goku landed on top of him again, his hand sinking deep into Sanzo's chest. As the breath slowly left him, Sanzo reached out one hand and grabbed a handful of Goku's hair at the back of his head, and with the other, shoved the diadem back on. A blood chilling cry escaped Goku's lips as he grabbed his head and arched back, letting Sanzo fall back to the ground, the ground becoming soaked with the priest's blood.

"You… stupid… monkey…." Sanzo gasped and he fell back, forcing himself to stay conscious as he looked at Goku.

Goku knelt on the ground, hands on the ground, head down, breathing heavy then slumping to the ground. Sanzo felt himself slip away, the darkness taking him as he saw the Goku was back to normal. With the last of his strength he reached out a bloodied hand and put it on Goku's head as he fell into the blackness

Sometime later, Goku's eyes opened, blurred and hazy. Rubbing them as he looked around he tried to remember what had happened. His eyes fell on the lifeless body of Ensui and he remember he and Sanzo being attacked… Sanzo, where was he? Jumping to his feet he looked around, his heart stopping as he saw the priest laying nearby, his body still and silent, his once white robes now dirty and stained an ugly shade of red. Dropping to his knees Goku called his name, trying to wake Sanzo up. 

"Sanzo, get up... you gotta get up. Come on, open your eyes Sanzo, please! Come on, I know what you're doing. You're doing the same thing you did with Chin Yisou and you don't have to" Goku cried as he shook Sanzo harder. "Damn it, come on!"

As tears started to fill Goku's eyes, he was unaware that he was being watched as a shadowy figure stood at the edge of the clearing. 

"Dammit Sanzo! It's over! Ensui is dead, why are you still lying there?" Goku finally looks at the rest of Sanzo's body. There are so many bruises and wounds that it's hard to believe that anyone could be alive. "Sanzo? Who did this? Was it me?" Goku's hand trembles as he touches one bruise after another. " It can't be me, it just can't! I would never do this to you!" Goku lays Sanzo on the forest floor and begins to tear the monk's robes, looking for more damage. He can't hold back the moans of anger and pain any longer when he finally realizes what he's done. "Why didn't you stop me, you bastard! You knew what I could do and still you let me. I hate you! I hate you... I hate you!" Sobs tear from Goku's throat as he pounds on the forest floor. 

During this time, the dark figure walked quietly into the clearing, stopping a few feet behind where Goku lay on the ground beside the broken body of Sanzo. All that was heard for a few moments was the sobs coming from Goku as he pounded his fist to the ground weakly. Then the stranger began to speak. "What a shame... that's too bad isn't it Miffy? After all this time, this is how Sanzo-sam goes out." The stranger stood there in a long white lab coat, a black tie half undone, several days worth of stubble on his face, and a white plush bunny held in his hand as he spoke to it. The figure smiles as Goku raises his head, tears blurring his vision so badly that he can't make out the figure. Goku ignores the man and turns his attention back to Sanzo.

"I didn't mean it, ya know. I don't hate you." Goku's body gives one last shudder and he raises himself off the ground. "You would never let me say this to you while you were alive, Sanzo... so I'm going to say it now." Goku took a shuddering breath as a sob escaped him. "I love you, big brother. You took me out of my pain and loneliness and gave me a family to call my own. I will take you back to the monastery... and not leave your side until you are given the burial you deserve." Goku put his head down and wiped the tears away.

"That was quite the speech... Miffy and I are on the verge of tears" the man said with a laugh. Goku turned around and faced the man, stepping back slightly in surprise. "Oh do not pay me any attention my friend. We are just here to pick up something from our dear friend Sanzo-sama. My name is Nii Jiany by the way, and you are Son Goku are you not?" 

Goku just stood there glaring at the man through his tears. 

"Well we will just be taking the Saten scripture and we will be on our way..." Ni stooped down and reached out towards Sanzos' broken and bloody body towards the scriptures that still lay draped around his shoulders.

" Do you like your head where it is? I don't think you want to do that." Goku stepped between Sanzo's body and Nii Jianyi. Nyoi-bo appeared in his hands and Goku spread his legs in a battle stance. "What the hell do you want with the scripture? Are you working for Koujaji?" Goku took a step toward Nii Jianyi. "Answer me, you fucker!"

"Oh my my quite to protective animal aren't you?" Nii said with a laugh "Actually you have it the other way around. Kougajii works for me. As for what I want with the scriptures, that is my own business... however," Nii smiled slightly and took a step closer to Goku. "If you were to give me the scriptures, you could come with me- you can be part of the revival of Guymouh... you can be one of the most powerful youkai in the new world he will create. After all, there is not much left for you here without the blonde hair priest is there? You were loyal to him from the very beginning, and yet he still left you alone. Come with me and you can find true meaning and purpose in life- you can become what you were truly meant to be."

"He didn't leave me! I killed him! I killed him...oh god, I killed him.." Goku's breath caught in his throat as he gripped the staff in his hands tightly then looked back up at Nii. Goku took another step towards him, bringing up Nyoi-bo in preparation to strike. "I am not an animal. Don't you ever call me that again!" Goku's grip was so hard on his staff that his knuckles were turning white and his hands and arms started to shake. Goku sneered, "Kougajii works for you? Do you always brag about your failures? If Kougajii couldn't steal the scripture what the hell makes you think you can?"

"Ah I can be very... persuasive... isn't that right MIffy?" Nii said as he poked the plushy under his arm. Goku stared at him in disgusted shock, the guy was more insane than anything... he wasn't going to waist his time on this nut. Turning his back on Nii Goku started back towards Sanzo and knelt down beside him.. Nii stepped closer, slowly drawing the Katana blade and raising it ready to strike

Goku whipped around as he heard the unmistakable sound of a sword being drawn. He raised up Nyoi-bo getting ready to block Nii Jianyi's katana. But, something out of the corner of his eye caught his attention and he started to lower his staff. Nii threw back his head and let loose an evil laugh. "My goodness...boy...you are making my task so much easier. I'll be sure to let the birds feed on you and your 'precious' priest's bodies because that is the least you deserve!" he shouted as he kicked the lifeless body that lay before him Goku opened his mouth in shock and just stared behind Nii.

Yuuru had finally made it, he had been trailing Nii for days, ever since he had come down to the lower world. With the arrival of Konzen in the Heavens, he knew Goku was alone. And after learning of the treachery between Ro and Nii he knew where he would be heading. Now, finally, he had found him. He crept up behind Nii, without even the smallest sound. As Nii raised his arms over his head, ready to bring the sword down, Yuuru reached out and grabbed Nii's hand, stopping it in mid air. The man turned around in surprise. 

"What the..." 

"I really would leave the boy alone Nii Jiany... it is not worth getting killed over, or worse."

A flash of fear passed over Nii's eyes. This man... he wasn't normal, there was no way he was an ordinary man. 

"I will say it again, leave the boy alone." Yuuru tightened his grip on Nii's wrist, his fingers leaving marks on his arm. 

When Nii tried to pull free and lunge towards the scriptures, Yuuru flung his arm back, sending Nii skidding across the clearing, stopping only when he struck one of the large oak trees and laid on the forest floor, knocked out cold. Yuuru sighed and turned back to face Goku who stared at him.

"Who are you?" Goku looked at the grey haired man in amazement. "What's your name?" 

"Don't you know, Son Goku?" Yuuru smiled gently at the young boy. "I thought you knew my name" "How did you find me and how did you know my name?" Goku lowered Nyoi-bo to his waist and smiled back at the older man. He couldn't help it, there was such a comforting feeling radiating off this man. "I thought you knew I would come. I heard you calling to me." 

Goku looked up at him "I.. I wasn't calling anyone..."

"Well anyways, I am here now… and you are safe." Yuuru smiled slightly at Goku. Then his eyes drifted over to the body of Sanzo and he sighed. "Well we can't leave him here can we? Sanzo-sama deserves a proper burial of a Sanzo monk. " Goku nodded as he walked over and stood beside Yuuru the tears still threatening to fall. "I... I was going to take him... back to the monastery... back to Kinzan Temple.." Goku muttered.

"And we shall Son Goku, we shall do it... for him."

Yuuru knelt down, careful gathering up the priest's limp body as Goku stood close. Closing his eyes he muttered softly under his breath as everything faded away, the next instant it seemed they were standing outside the gates of Kinzan Temple countless miles away. The next few moments were a flurry of activity and questions as the monks hurried out to meet them. Yuuru knew what was coming, and he also knew Goku was not going to react well to it. Yuuru stood beside the boy as the head priest addressed them, telling them that outsiders were not allowed to attend or view the burial, that it was against customs to allow outsiders in. Yuuru looked down at Goku who was still kneeling beside his beloved Sanzo, hands gripping the stained robes. 

"Goku?" he asked softly.

"We were here a long time ago..." Goku said, speaking softly to himself. "The trees had the most delicious peaches and I would sneak up and eat them whenever we were here. Sanzo knew how much the monks hated it when I stole the peaches but... but I think he enjoyed watching the monks freak out." Goku smiled at the memory. "Are you going to let me in with my big brother, or not?" Goku met the eyes of the oldest monk in front of him. 

"Who do you think you are, child? Do you really think that we would let in something like you?" Goku stepped away from Sanzo's body but a hand on his shoulder stopped him. Yuuru put a worn hand on the boy's shoulder and pulled him back slightly.

"Goku..." he said softly. Do not waste your time arguing with them. You know how stubborn Sanzo was and these priests are even more stubborn than he was."

"How dare you!" the old priest started but Yuuru kept on. "Goku... I offer you this choice. You can stay here and argue with the monks and make them let you in bury Sanzo, or... you can come with me to Taisin and be reunited with him once more." The monks stared at him at the mention of the heavens and Goku looked up at him. Yuuru smiled and slowly knelt down to Goku's level.

"Really? You're serious?" Goku looked deep into Yuuru's eyes. There was no telltale twinkle that Yuuru was joking. He was serious. "Can I take anything with me?" 

"No, my child. You must come with me now and bring nothing of this world with you." Yuuru replied.

"But, I have things that I don't want to give up! Like Sanzo's lighter...I know I don't smoke but it's special to me... and I have things from Gojyo and Hakkai." Goku started to sob. "I can't believe you would be so heartless that you would make me leave the only things precious to me here!" Goku fell to his knees, hugging his arms around his belly.

Yuuru said nothing, just put his hand on Goku's head and ruffled his hair slightly, much like sanzo always use to.

"Then how about this... give these precious items to me, I promise I will keep them somewhere safe, and if the time ever comes when you need them, I shall show you where they are. Is that agreeable?" Yuuru smiled down at the boy, he knew this had to be one of the hardest things Goku had ever had to do.

"Alright, I don't know why but I feel I can trust you." Goku pulled several things out of his pockets, handing each item to Yuuru as if they were precious jewels. "That's all of them." Goku squared his shoulders. "Can I have a moment to say good-bye?" 

One of the monks stepped forward as if to stop Goku but a hard look from Yuuru stopped him dead in his tracks.

"Of course, you can my child." Yuuru and the others moved away to give Goku a few moments.

"Hey, Sanzo. Well, this is it. I kinda thought I would be with you forever or at least until you decided to settled down with a woman and raise a family. That... that's something you'll never do now. Gojyo would have loved coming to visit. Well, not you but your daughters. And Hakkai... you know he would always be coming by to visit." Tears wet the ground in front of Goku's feet. "I failed you big brother. Not only did we not make it to Shangra-la but the bad guys won. I just wanted to say that just because I'm leaving this earth, I'm not going to give up trying to be what you want me to be. Yuuru says I'll be seeing you soon." Goku buried his face in Sanzo's chest. "I love you, big brother. I hope you remember me when we meet again." Goku stood up, wiped his eyes and faced Yuuru. "Come on old man," Goku's lip trembled, "take me home."

Yuuru looked at the simple trinkets that to Goku were worth more than gold: First was Sanzo's lighter, worn and covered in scratches. Beside that was several tabs from the numerous cans of beer Gojyo had drunk over their travels, neatly strung together in a small chain. The final object Yuuru held in his hand was a small gold chain, which had long ago broken off the pocket watch Hakkai always carried. Yuuru smiled as he slipped these treasures into the pocket of his robe. He stared the monks back away from Goku as he knelt down beside Sanzo to say his goodbyes.

"Come on old man, take me home," he said, fighting hard to keep his voice from cracking.

Yuuru nodded slightly, seeing how hard Goku fought against the tears. Putting a hand on the boy's shoulder they turned and slowly started walking away, leaving the monks to tend to the burial. As they walked Goku swallowed hard and looked up at Yuuru.

"What is it like?" Yuuru looked down at the young boy.

"Taisin? it is beautiful Goku- peach cherry and apple trees grow on the hills, there are waterfalls and lush gardens all around..." Goku nodded. "I cant wait to see it..." his voice trailed off.

They continued on, Kinzan temple fading farther behind them. Goku's heart was heavy, this was the first time in his entire life he had ever willingly walked the opposite direction Sanzo was in. Yuuru looked down at Goku who was starting to get sleepy, his eyes getting heavy. Good, that was just how he had planned it. Stopping for a moment, he turned to Goku and picked him up as the sleep took hold of him.

"Rest Goku, you will see them again soon."

One moment they were there walking down the hill and the next they were gone. When Goku woke it was to the sound of Yuuru calling his name. Opening his eyes he looked up to find Yuuru kneeling beside him as he lay in thick green grass, surrounded by wildflowers and a blue sky overhead. Sitting up he looked at Yuuru.

"Are we back?" Goku looked around to see if he recognized anything. So far, nothing was familiar to him... but, as he looked to his left, he saw trees swaying gently in the breeze. "Hey, I remember those!" A loud growling sound broke the mood. "I guess I'm a little hungry." Goku smiled sheepishly. "I once climbed that tree to get some peach...Konzen! I remember Konzen!" A huge grin split Goku's face. "And Tenpou! I remember Tenpou! Aww, and that stupid perverted general, Kenren. He's not here too is he?" Goku looked slyly at Yuuru.

"Yes, they are all here." Goku cracked his knuckles. "Good, I owe him one still and I was worried I might forget all about that." Yuuru chuckled, ruffling Goku's hair. "You will see them soon. Now, how about we have a snack before we go?"

He didn't have to ask Goku twice as the boy headed straight to the first peach tree and was soon sitting in the branches.

"Wow I had forgotten how sweet and juicy these things were! Hey Yuuru, try one!" Goku grinned broadly as he tossed a peach down. Yuuru caught it and smiled, leaning against the tree as Goku ate several of the perfectly ripe peaches.

'They are all here... at last" he thought to himself. "Things are starting to look up for us at last." 

A few minutes and a few peaches later Goku jumped down from the tree. 

"Come on I want to find Konzen Tenpou and Kenren!" He grabbed Yuuru's hand and started dragging him along, remembering the way to palace and to their favorite meeting place. Yuuru laughed and followed behind, equally egger to see this reunion.


End file.
